Ghost of Christmas Present: There is never enough time to do or say all the things that we would wish. The thing is to try to do as much as you can in the time that you have. Remember Scrooge, time is short, and suddenly, you're not there any more.
Charlie: You the man.
Jack: No, I'm the snowman.
Gen. Esperanza: Freedom.
[John McClane appears and punches him in the face.]
John McClane: Not yet.
Scrooge: What's she cooking, a canary? Surely they have more food than that. Look on the fire.
Ghost of Christmas Present: Huh, where? Oh, that's your laundry.
Officer Allen: We're looking for the man with the hands.
Santa: Haven't you heard of peace on Earth, and goodwill toward men?
Lock, Shock, Barrel: NO!
Melanie 'Mel' Whitfield: So, technically, you slept with Santa?
Kelli Whitfield: Well, I didn't know he was Santa at the time... but technically, I guess I did.
Melanie 'Mel' Whitfield: Well, ho, ho, ho.
Nick Kringle: I'm Santa, you know. I don't get a vacation. I don't even get Christmas off.
Noelle Kringle: Well, you can't be Santa if your having a nervous breakdown.
Kris: If you can't learn to accept ANYTHING on faith, then you are doomed for a life dominated by doubt.
Trudie: There may not be such a thing as a perfect job, a perfect life or a perfect family, but there is such a thing as a perfect moment. So I take back what I said. Doing one crazy thing probably does make you crazy, but it also can make you happy.
Kris: You messed with the wrong sisters.
Willie: Spare some change. Think about somebody besides your fucking self.
Toymaker: Oh, for heaven's sakes! Such a dreadful temper! I'm glad I'm not marrying you! Well, I am marrying you, but I'm marrying you to her.
Mr. Green: We both know Miley was flawless.
Steve: This is Germany, Father. They drive on the right. National dish: sausage.
Thomas: How could you kill a poor, defenseless animal? Angela! You're really starting to piss me off.
Barb: I think the little buggers schnockered, son of a bitch.
Tia Hall: Honey, the girls are having a great time showing everybody the lights. I pray to God that's the only thing they're showing.
Gator: Hey Taffy, baby, come suck your daddy's dick.
Taffy: I wouldn't suck your lousy dick if I was suffocating and there was oxygen in your balls.