Dr. Wilson: Is there a light somewhere that goes on when I have food?
House: Green for food, orange for beverages, red for impure thoughts. That bulb burns out every two weeks.
Dr. Cameron: Men should grow up.
House: Yeah. And dogs should stop licking themselves. It's not going to happen!
Dr. Foreman: You figure that anybody that gives a crap about people in Africa must be full of it?
House: Yes. There's an evolutionary imperative why we give a crap about our family and friends. And there's an evolutionary imperative why we don't give a crap about anybody else. If we loved all people indiscriminately, we couldn't function.
Dr. Foreman: Hmmm. So, the great humanitarian's as selfish as the rest of us.
House: Just not as honest about it.
House: [knocking on Dr. Wilson's door.] I know you're in there. I can hear you caring.
Dr. Wilson: If you have the money then why did you need the loan?
House: I didn't. I just wanted to see if you'd give it to me. I've been borrowing increasing amounts ever since you lent me $40 a year ago. Ummm, a little experiment to see where you'd draw the line.
Dr. Wilson: You're...you're trying to objectively measure how much I value our friendship.
House: It's five grand – you got nothing to be ashamed of.
Dr. Wilson: Now, be a grown-up and either tell Mommy and Daddy you don't want to see them, or I'm picking you up at seven for dinner.
House: What do you mean? You just said...?
Dr. Wilson: I lied. I've been lying to you in increasing amounts ever since I told you you looked good unshaved a year ago. It's a little experiment, you know, to see where you'd draw the line.
Answer: You have the right episode. The big deal at the end about the letters on the pills was to show that Brandon had the wrong pills all along. House was smiling because he was right.
MoonFaery ★