Tiger Woods: I always wanted to say this... fa-shizzle.
Phaze 2: Yo, go in there and get me a Philly blunt son.
Tron: And a banana Cognac, biotch.
Rick James: They shoulda never gave you ni**as money.
Silky Johnson: That was Beautiful. On the weekends, Beautiful does stunts for Little Richard in gay movies.
Audience Member: Negrodamus, why is President Bush convinced there are weapons of mass destruction in Iraq?
Negrodamus: Because he has the receipt.
Dave Chappelle: Welcome back to Chappelle Show, I still haven't been canceled yet but I'm workin' on it.
Dave Chappelle: Skeet Skeet Skeet.
Vernon: Thug life! You think this a game, ni**a! Arf! Arf! WU-TANG.
Charlie Murphy: Because of my complexion, he use to call me Darkness. He calls me and brother Darkness. The Darkness Brothers. See, this is long before Wesley Snipes. Back then... we was the blackest ni**as on the planet according to Rick James.
Silky Johnston: Rosie O'Donnel. She wears underwear with dick holes.
Chris: Hey Tanisha, it was good seeing you.
Darius: "Good seeing you?" Good seeing you? That's my girl, ni**a! I keep it real.
Black Gallagher: Pink Hearts, Yellow Moons, Green Clovers, and Orange Stars - that leprechauns' on acid.
Silky Johnston: Now, if you'll excuse me. I'm gonna go put water in Buck Nasty's Mama's dish.
Dave Chappelle: Oh, Sally, it's not what's gotten into me, it's what's gotten into Oprah! My seed, son! Ha ha h aha! I'm rich, bitch! Ha ha ha.
Bill Burr: You know, I have to admit, I saw this robbery coming from a mile away, which is why I put my car keys up my ass.
Tron: Katie has some big ass tit-tays.
Chad: Hi, I'm Chad, your new roommate.
Tyree: Well, looky here, "Chad." For the entire period you in my room, I better not catch you standing up peeing. You sit down when you pee, you got that? Now get your fat ass on outta here.
Rick James: I'm Rick James, bitch.
P. Diddy: All right, I got some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that I'm gonna have to shut down the studio. The good news is that I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance.
Chad: Be careful if you ever get a sleeper hold. The next day your anus will really hurt.
