Quotes from Scott Caan movies and TV shows

Jared: So how long you know this one for?
Bryce: I don't know, about 14 hours now. Picked her up last night at The Mercer Club.
Amanda: Nuh-uh. I picked you up last night. Don't start lyin' already.

Amanda: How many do you think are down there?
Bryce: Enough bricks to build a house, a multi-million dollar cocaine palace.

Sam: We found bodies. Don't you think we should tell someone?
Bryce: They're drug dealers, Sam. They're not missionaires flying care packages to starving kids in Africa, okay? Don't worry, their girlfriends will have new pimps before the milk in the refrigerator goes bad. It's fine.

Bryce: The guy who owned this place got hit with 44 counts of racketeering and money laundering. Our firm represented him. This is how he floated the bill.
Jared: You gotta be kidding me.
Bryce: Boat problem? No problem. Boat and skis come with the crib.
Jared: We get the boat?
Bryce: You know how Daddy does it.
Jared: We get the boat?
Bryce: We get the boat.
Jared: We get the boat! We get the boat.

Jared: He is not the guy you wanna pick a fight with.
Bryce: I didn't pick a fight, I didn't pick a fight.
Amanda: Yeah you didn't pick a fight... you just punched the guy.

Virgil Malloy: Are you a man?
Turk Malloy: Yes, nineteen.
Virgil Malloy: Are you alive?
Turk Malloy: Yes, eighteen.
Virgil Malloy: Evel Knievel.
Turk Malloy: ...shit.

Turk Malloy: Watch it, bud.
Virgil Malloy: Who you calling bud, pal?
Turk Malloy: Who you calling pal, friend?
Virgil Malloy: Who you calling friend, jackass?
Turk Malloy: Don't call me a jackass.
Virgil Malloy: I just did call you a jackass.

Turk Malloy: I don't care if it gets messy.
Virgil Malloy: I'll drive you. We'll get him leaving his barber.
Livingston Dell: And I'll inject him.
Basher Tarr: And I'll find a spot to get rid of the body.
Rusty Ryan: All valid ideas. Great initiative. But.

Turk Malloy: Are you in yet?
Virgil Malloy: I hate that question.

Rusty Ryan: Turn the machine off guys.
Turk Malloy: It is off.
Rusty Ryan: Are you kidding?
Turk Malloy: Does it sound like I'm laughing, sweetheart?

Turk Malloy: Don't change the facial structure.
Virgil Malloy: I'm making you taller. Don't you want to be taller? You're a midget in 34 states.
Turk Malloy: Yeah, well, I'm an animal in the other 34. [Virgil stares at him.] 24. 22.

Turk Malloy: I'll give you a million dollars if you don't speak for a month.
Virgil Malloy: I wanna eat your whole head.

Gordie Boggs: Hey kid! Move your fat head. I can't see the fight.
Sean Dawkins: Sorry, Uncle Billy said these were good seats.
Gordie Boggs: Uncle Billy sucks.
Sean Dawkins: Hey, Uncle Billy lost his right nut in 'nam.
Gordie Boggs: Well kick him in his left nut when you see him. These seats bite.
Sean Dawkins: If you only have one left, is it still your left nut?

Sean Dawkins: According to his authorized biography, Jimmy King worked very hard in high school. And after you died in the plane crash, he went to community college and supported you while he held two jobs.
Fred King: I oughta kick yer ass! Freak.
Jane King: We saw him last week. He came and borrowed our motor home. We haven't seen him since. The big shit.

Mr. Boggs: Woah! What the hell are these?
Sean Dawkins: Those are my nuts.
Mr. Boggs: Wouldn't you like to be on the other side of this search?
Sean Dawkins: You want me to grab your nuts?

Gordie Boggs: What about Wendy? She digs you.
Sean Dawkins: No... she's too much like one of the guys.
Gordie Boggs: That's bad?
Sean Dawkins: That's gay.

Sean Dawkins: Tonight we rejoice! We rejoice with the King in his motorcastle.
Gordie Boggs: Partyyy.

Sean Dawkins: We're gonna be there! We're going.
Mrs. MacKenzie: Get me a T-shirt... a really tight one.
Gordie Boggs: That's gross, Mrs. MacKenzie.

Sean Dawkins: All right, it's a little strange! But what are we supposed to do?
Gordie Boggs: Exactly.
Sean Dawkins: What?

Sean Dawkins: Hey Gordy?
Gordie Boggs: Yea?
Sean Dawkins: Why does it look like you have your finger in your butt?
Gordie Boggs: Because I do... stupid.