Lou Peckinpaugh: What you you doing here?
Betty DeBoop: I missed my boat.
Lou Peckinpaugh: It doesn't sail until tomorrow.
Betty DeBoop: So I missed it a little early.
Quotes from Eileen Brennan movies and TV shows
Betty DeBoop: You'll be back.
Lou Peckinpaugh: What makes you think so?
Betty DeBoop: You forgot the glasses.
Marcel: Gentlemen, may I present Miss Betty DeBoop from the Islands?
Colonel Schlissel: Caribbean or Virgin?
Betty DeBoop: Well, let's just say I came back a Caribbean.
Mrs. Peacock: Uh, is there a little girl's room in the hall?
Yvette: Oui oui, Madame.
Mrs. Peacock: No, I just wanna powder my nose.
Tess Skeffington: He was arrested in 1932 in Chicago for selling pornographic Bibles. The D.A. couldn't make the charge stick when the church refused to turn over the Bibles.
Tess Skeffington: I'm scared, Sam. Hold me.
Sam Diamond: Hold yourself. I'm busy.
Lionel Twain: I'm the greatest, I'm number one.
Sam Diamond: To me, you look like number two, know what I mean?
Dora Charleston: What does he mean, Miss Skeffington?
Tess Skeffington: I'll tell you later. It's disgusting.
Tess Skeffington: I don't feel good about this, Sam. Maybe tonight's the night your luck runs out.
Sam Diamond: Maybe so. There's a number on the wall for all of us, angel, and if tonight's the night they pick mine, so be it. After you, sweetheart.
Tess Skeffington: Sam, why do you keep all those naked muscle men magazines in your office?
Sam Diamond: Suspects. Always looking for suspects.
Sam Diamond: Maybe I'm just a patsy being set up take the fall, but I'm not falling for any o'yous, you understand?
Tess Skeffington: Not even me, Sam?
Sam Diamond: Why don't you fall in love with the Jap kid and get off my back?
Tess Skeffington: Twain picked up Sam in a gay bar.
Sam Diamond: I was working on a case! Working.
Tess Skeffington: Every night for six months?
Capt. Doreen Lewis: Benjamin, you are not FIT to wear that uniform.
Judy Benjamin: No shit.
Judy Benjamin: I think they sent me to the wrong place.
Capt. Doreen Lewis: Uh-huh.
Judy Benjamin: See, I did join the army, but I joined a different army. I joined the one with the condos and the private rooms.
Judy Benjamin: To be truthful with you, I can't sleep in a room with 20 strangers.
Capt. Doreen Lewis: Oh dear.
Judy Benjamin: And I mean look at this place. The army couldn't afford drapes? I'll be up at the crack of dawn here.
Capt. Doreen Lewis: If Patton were alive, he would slap your face.