Two fallen angels, Loki and Bartleby, are trying to get back into heaven. However, their method of choice results in the destruction of all human life. A direct descendant of Christ, Bethany, is contacted by Metatron who tells her of the situation. She is the only one that can stop Loki and Bartleby from destroying all humanity. They are helped by Rufus, the thirteenth apostle and by prophets, Jay and Silent Bob. A demon named Azarael is working against them however.
Bethany: I don't want this, it's too big.
Metatron: That's what Jesus said. Yes, I had to tell him. And you can imagine how that hurt the Father - not to be able to tell the Son Himself because one word from His lips would destroy the boy's frail human form? So I was forced to deliver the news to a scared child who wanted nothing more than to play with other children. I had to tell this little boy that He was God's only Son, and that it meant a life of persecution and eventual crucifixion at the hands of the very people He came to enlighten and redeem. He begged me to take it back, as if I could. He begged me to make it all not true. And I'll let you in on something, Bethany, this is something I've never told anyone before... If I had the power, I would have.
Trivia: When Jay drags Bethany behind the PA equipment and says that she'd agree to sleep with him if it was the end of the world, he pulls out a condom. If it's the end of the world, and existence is going to be undone, why bother with a condom? [It's a gag, rather than a mistake in the film. Worth keeping as trivia though.]
Question: How do Bartleby and Loki know Rufus? They haven't been in Heaven since they were expelled after killing all the first born sons of Egypt, which happened during Moses' time. Rufus died two years after Christ died and went straight to Heaven. Christ lived and died hundreds of years after Moses. So, presumably, Bartleby and Loki were in Wisconsin when Rufus went to Heaven. How would they recognize him?
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