Peter Quill: You're like Mary Poppins.
Yondu: Is he cool?
Peter Quill: [Pause.] Hell yeah, he's cool.
Yondu: I'm Mary Poppins, y'all!
Rocket: Quill, later tonight you're going to be lying down in your bed, there's going to be something squishy in your pillowcase and you're gonna be like "what's this?" and it's gonna be because I put a turd in there!
Peter Quill: You put your turd in my bed, I shave you.
Rocket: Oh, it won't be my turd. It'll be Drax's.
Drax: [Laughs] I have famously huge turds.
Gamora: We're about to die and this is what we're discussing?
Peter Quill: This is weird. We've got a Sovereign fleet approaching from the rear.
Gamora: Why would they do that?
Drax: Probably because Rocket stole some of their batteries.
Rocket: Dude!
Drax: Right... He didn't steal some of those. I don't know why they're after us. What a mystery this is.
Nebula: Look at you, a Garden of the Galaxy!
Gamora: It's Guardian! Why would I be a Garden of the Galaxy?
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: He hates hats.
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: On anyone, not just himself.
Groot: I am Groot.
Rocket: One minute you think someone has a weird-shaped head, the next minute it's just because you realise part of that head is the hat. [To Groot] That's why you don't like hats?
Drax: This gross bug lady is my new friend.
Peter Quill: Nobody has any tape!
Rocket: Not a single person has tape?
Peter Quill: You have an atomic bomb in your bag! If anyone is gonna have tape, it's *YOU*!
Rocket: You people have issues.
Peter Quill: Well, of course I have issues. That's my freakin' father.
Peter Quill: What is it?
Kraglin: It's called a Zune. It's what everybody's listening to on Earth nowadays.
Rocket: Are we really saving the galaxy, again?
Peter Quill: Yeah.
Rocket: Great! We can jack up our prices if we're two-time galaxy savers.
Yondu: He may have been your father, boy, but he wasn't your daddy.
Mantis: It's beautiful.
Drax: It is. And so are you. On the inside.
Drax: There are two types of beings in the universe: those who dance, and those who do not.
Peter Quill: I get it, yes. I am a dancer, Gamora is not.
Drax: You need to find a woman who's pathetic, like you.
Yondu: I don't use my head to fly the arrow, boy! I use my heart.
Peter Quill: You shouldn't have killed my mom and squished my Walkman.
Baby Groot: I am Groot.
Yondu: What's that?
Rocket: He says, "Welcome to the frickin' Guardians of the Galaxy!" Only he didn't use "frickin'."
Ego: After all these years I found you. My name is Ego, and I'm your dad, Peter. I wanted to experience what it was to be human. So I created what I thought a biological being would be like.
Drax: Did you make a penis?
Peter Quill: Shut up!
Ego: Yes, Drax, I got a penis. It's not half bad, either.
Chosen answer: Short answer: Probably nothing much good. In all that time Quinn still felt like a reaver, and Rocket doesn't deny he likes crime. Only Gamora keeps them at bay from doing anything really nasty. In the mean time they try to do good things, protect planets, hunt pirates, stuff like that. It's a crazy bunch of individuals.
lionhead