Deputy Norman Ramsey: We ain't never gonna catch him, are we, Captain?
Captain J.D. Morales: You want an official or a private reply?
Deputy Norman Ramsey: Private.
Captain J.D. Morales: If we do catch him... it's gonna be a miracle.
Hellsgate rancher: They call this country Hell's Gate. When my dad came in here, it was nothing but a bunch of savage Indians. And Jesuits. Old Thomas Jefferson said that he was a warrior so his son could be a farmer, so his son could be a poet. And I raise cattle so my son can be a merchant, so his son can move to Newport, Rhode Island and buy a sailboat and never see one of these bastard-ass sons of bitching mountains again.
Si: Who was Thomas Jefferson?
Hellsgate rancher: A guy back east.
Detective Cranston: She is a weird little girl. Did you notice her tits? When I put the tube around her she looked at me, like she wanted me to feel her up.
Sam Clayton: I ain't getting no younger. Time just goes by and then... then one day... one day you just get older and suddenly... you find yourself... all alone.
Jenny: You deserve to be alone.
Jason Smith: Are you really a trickster?
Zachariah Coop: Oh, I think most people are at a certain level. But remember this: you can't trick a man unless he's aiming to trick you.
Jason Smith: How come?
Zachariah Coop: Well, because people in general like the idea of getting something for nothing. And the trickster affords him that opportunity.
Sherlock Holmes: No, Watson! The Queen wouldn't like it.
Lucy: Are you a doctor?
Al: Yeah, how'd you know?
Lucy: Dirty shoes and clean white hands.
Al: A lot of guys have clean hands.
Lucy: But not that clean. It must have taken you ten years at least to get them that clean.
Al: What are you, a commercial or what?
Franklin Frank: Any jerk can direct.
Mario: Somebody's out there.
Dr. Abner Perry: You cannot mesmerise me! I'm British.
Tim: Sid what do you know about romance?
Sid: Nothing, I'm married.
Woody Guthrie: This land is your land/This land is my land/From California to the New York Island/From the Redwood forests to the Gulf Stream waters/This land was made for you and me.
Howard Beale: We'll tell you anything you want to hear, we lie like hell.
Blanche: You're a fink.
George: If I'm a fink then you're an ungrateful bitch.
Sybil Dorsett: Who dat?
Richard J. Loomis: Who dat who say who dat?
Sybil Dorsett: Who dat who say who dat who say who dat?
Dwan: You know I had my horoscope done before I flew out to Hong Kong. And it said that I was going to cross over water and meet the biggest person in my life.
Fairy Godmother: You're not meant to understand it. You're meant to accept it. Graciously.
Annabel: Max, you big hamburger.
Kitty Baxter: Dan's a good man, and he's never eaten a whole person in his entire life.
Kathy: I wanted vanilla twist.