Col. Martin Hessler: Germans are still the best toy makers in the World.
Farmer: Every time one of these Lancasters fly over, my chickens lay premature eggs.
[Addressing a roomful of Japanese businessmen.]
President Benson: It seems like only yesterday I was strafing so many of your homes. Yet here I am today, begging you not to make such good cars.
Hatch: This frigging game is ruining my life.
Colonel Nicholson: We can teach these barbarians a lesson in Western methods and efficiency that will put them to shame. We'll show them what the British soldier is capable of doing.
2nd Lieutenant: First time on U-boat?
Lt. Werner: Yeah. First time. It's gonna be exciting.
2nd Lieutenant: Do you have a will?
Lt. Werner: Excuse Me?
2nd Lieutenant: 13 boats down last moth. Sank with men and mice. Exciting, huh?
Maj. Schroeder: Ah, tell me what has all this to do with that, uh, suitcase case you keep looking at?
Mallory: Well, that suitcase is full of our penicillin.
Maj. Schroeder: Oh, indeed. Perhaps I could see some it?
Mallory: Certainly, Major. Open it Miller.
Miller: You can't do that here, sir. You'll ruin the lot. You know perfectly well that any contamination will destroy it. It's got to be opened under laboratory conditions.
Joe Enders: Stay on my ass.
Paul Rawlins: What's that got to do with my knob?
Dalai Lama: We have a saying in Tibet: If a problem can be solved there is no use worrying about it. If it can't be solved, worrying will do no good.
Capt. T.C. Doyle: You slept with the wife of General "Kill-'em-all-and-let-God-sort-them-out" Richardson?
David Poole: I thought it was his daughter.
Capt. T.C. Doyle: Oh yeah, he would've been fine with that.
Abou Fatma: I found you half dead crossing the desert alone and you say you are afraid?
Gen. 'Stonewall' Jackson: In the Army of the Shenandoah, you were the First Brigade! In the Army of the Potomac you were the First Brigade! In the Second Corps of this Army, you are the First Brigade! You are the First Brigade in the affections of your general, and I hope by your future deeds and bearing you will be handed down the posterity as the First Brigade in this our Second War of Independence. God Speed.
Col. Werner Visser: Strange thing about war wounds - the older you get, the less proud of them you become.
Mrs. Higgins: Think you can make anymore damn noise, what that damn car of yours?
Stephen: Sorry, Mrs. Higgins.
Mrs. Higgins: And stop trying to look through my dress, and see my nipples.
Renato Amoroso: Signora Malena, a more capable person than me... wrote that the only true love is unrequited love. Now I understand why. It's been so long since you last came out of your house. But the longer we are apart, the stronger my love becomes.
Intertitle: Second Part - Reconstruction. The agony which the South endured that a nation might be born. The blight of war does not end when hostilities cease.
Ada: I brought you this book... and this photo. I'm not smiling in it. I don't know how to do that... hold a smile.
Captain Mainwaring: I intend to mould those men out there into an aggressive fighting force. I'm not going to get very far if you keep inviting them to "step this way."