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Mrs Doyle: There's always time for a nice cup of tea. Sure, didn't the Lord himself pause for a nice cup of tea before giving himself up for the world.
Father Ted: No, he didn't, Mrs Doyle!
Mrs Doyle: Well, whatever the equivalent they had for tea in those days, cake or something. And speaking of cake, I have cake!
[Holds up a cupcake.]
Father Ted: No thanks, Mrs Doyle.
Mrs Doyle: Are you sure, Father? There's cocaine in it!
Father Ted: WHAT?
Mrs Doyle: Oh, no, not cocaine. God, what am I on about. No, what d'you call them. Raisins.
In the scene where Mrs. Doyle is telling Ted about the profanity in the book, several of the swears were not in the original script but were introduced by Pauline McLynn during filming. You can see Dermot Morgan trying not to laugh at her last line "Ride me sideways", which he hadn't been expecting.