Stanley Roper: I want my rent.
Helen Roper: Stanley, where are your manners? You're supposed to say hello when you walk into a room.
Stanley Roper: Hello, I want my rent.
Jack Tripper: And speaking of current events, did you read the big news in the paper this morning?
Chrissy: The May Company is having a huge sale on pantyhose.
Jack Tripper: Excuse me, Chrissy, that's not exactly a current event.
Chrissy: It is so, it's going on right now.
Ralph Furley: Ohhhh, I'm through with women.
Jack Tripper: Aww.
Ralph Furley: Don't you get any ideas.
Diane McMillan: Janet, do you know what I do for a living?
Janet Wood Dawson: Of course I do! It's right here on your card in black and white. Diane McMillan, The Rapist.
Jack Tripper: That's therapist.
Janet's Father: She always did have trouble with her reading.
Mrs. Roper: I need a new stove.
Stanley Roper: There's nothing wrong with the stove you have, it works just fine.
Mrs. Roper: Well, I better not break up the set.
Stanley Roper: What set?
Mrs. Roper: An old stove, and old husband, and they both take too long to heat up.
Chrissy: You know, if women ran the world there'd be none of these stupid wars.
Janet Wood Dawson: Yeah.
Stanley Roper: Yeah, all the countries would nag each other to death.
Janet Wood Dawson: Oh, no, no, no, no. Don't tell anybody you're a chef, okay?
Jack Tripper: Okay, mum's the word.
Janet Wood Dawson: Well, it's not that there's anything wrong with what you do, Jack. It's just that... everybody here looks so important and we want to make a good impression. Well, you understand, don't you?
Jack Tripper: Of course, pumpkin.
Janet Wood Dawson: Oh, thanks.
Jack Tripper: You're ashamed of me.
Stanley Roper: What's the cake for?
Helen Roper: We're celebrating.
Stanley Roper: Celebrating what?
Helen Roper: The tenth anniversary of my new spring outfit.
Chrissy: Jack, that smells good.
Jack Tripper: Chrissy, I haven't even started cooking yet.
Chrissy: Well, you better hurry up and start cooking so you can catch up with the smell.
Jack Tripper: Larry, haven't you ever thought of telling a girl the truth?
Larry: Well, I figure, anyone who gets up an hour early to put on eyeliner, fake eyelashes, and plastic nails isn't someone who wants to hear the truth.
Stanley Roper: I came up to shampoo your rug.
Chrissy: Why? Does it have dandruff?
Janet Wood Dawson: Chrissy, your dad is a minister, what does he usually say to couples in trouble?
Chrissy: He tells them to keep the baby.
Terri: I just felt sorry for you.
Jack Tripper: Sorry for me? Why would anybody feel sorry for me?
Janet Wood Dawson: Oh, lots of reasons.
Larry: I just wanted to know if you wanted to spend an evening with a beautiful, young lady.
Jack Tripper: No thanks, pal. I'd rather spend an evening with Janet.
Answer: I believe you are referring to the artwork of Alphonse Mucha. On the wall next to the front door was "Feather" (which is one half of "Primrose and Feather"). Above the telephone in early episodes was "Zodiac". Also seen through The Apartment was "Spring" and "Autumn".