Quotes from Michael Rooker movies and TV shows

Amelia: Excuse me, but the victim was already dead when we arrived.
Captain Howard Cheney: And you, half-assed patrolman working a crime scene... those days are over. I'll take that evidence bag now, thank you.
Amelia: You can take it with a chain of custody voucher, sir.
Captain Howard Cheney: Are you out of your mind? Hmmm? Let's go. You're coming with us.
Amelia: What? Are you arresting me?
Captain Howard Cheney: You just get in the car, and keep your mouth shut to the press.

Hal Tucker: You son of a bitch! You said you wouldn't kill him.
Eric Qualen: Sue me.

Hal Tucker: Gravity's a bitch, ain't it?

Clyde: You made it all this way for a girl, huh? Do you ever hear of the term fool's errand?

Clyde: Good instincts are earned by making mistakes.

Clyde: You can always tell in their eyes, just look at their eyes.

Terry: So the emcee asks, "What's the most romantic place you've ever made love to your wife?" And this guy's thinking, he's got a brain like a pea, but he's thinking, and he says, "In the butt!"

Starla Grant: Baby, what happened to your face?
Grant Grant: It's just a bee sting.

Butcher: What can I do you for?
Grant Grant: Gimme a couple of your ribeyes.
Butcher: How many you need?
Grant Grant: Eight. Naw... Ten. Uhm, no, no. You know what? Gimme fourteen.
Butcher: Having a party?
Grant Grant: Yeah, something like that. It's a... Little surprise for the wife.

Grant Grant: I've been around a million years! You think you can fuck with me?
Bill Pardy: Yep.