Quotes from Marilu Henner movies and TV shows

Lil: And shelf paper! Oh, Johnny, I love shelf paper.

Ma Kelly: You've gotten to be like a daughter to me and I wanna share somethin' with ya.
Lil: Awww, what's that Mom Kelley?
Ma Kelly: I go both ways.
Lil: Oh.

Johnny Kelly: Say kid, what do they call you?
Lil: Impressive.

Johnny Dangerously: The name's Dangerously. Johnny Dangerously.
Lil: Did you know you're last name is an adverb?

Harris: I'm not kissing anyone hello anymore.
Trudi: Well just shake hands with them.
Harris: Are you kidding? I just wash my hands and I shake hands with some guy that feels like he's been squashing caterpillars.

Harris: So, I'll see you Sunday?
Trudi: I got a shower Sunday.
Harris: Oh yeah, and I really should take a bath... Monday?

Tom: I'll have a decaf coffee.
Trudi: I'll have a decaf espresso.
Morris Frost: I'll have a double decaf cappuccino.
Ted: Give me decaffeinated coffee ice cream.
Harris: I'll have a half double decaffeinated half-caf, with a twist of lemon.
Trudi: I'll have a twist of lemon.
Tom: I'll have a twist of lemon.
Morris Frost: I'll have a twist of lemon.
Cynthia: I'll have a twist of lemon.

Harris: A sign spoke to me, said I was in trouble.
Trudi: If you're talking to signs, you are in trouble.

Trudi: He said it's the first day of spring.
Harris: Oh shit! Open season on the L.A. freeway.