Alan Bennett: Mary, as you call her, is a bigoted, blinkered, cantankerous, devious, unforgiving, self-serving, rank, rude, car-mad cow, which is to say nothing of her flying feces and her ability to extrude from her withered buttocks turds of such force, that they land a yard from the back of the van and their presumed point of exit.
Quotes from Alex Jennings movies and TV shows
Prince Charles: They're going back to sleep, or try anyways. My private secretary office have found a travel agency out in New York that will sell me a flight to Paris, with a hour stop over in Manchester. Perhaps now you might like to consider whether it's still an extravagance to bring back the mother of the future king of England. In one of our planes.
Prince Charles: Why is it? Why do they hate us so?
HM Queen Elizabeth II: Not us, dear.
Prince Charles: What?
HM Queen Elizabeth II: Hmm?
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