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Susan: Do you have anything you wanna say to women for having owned this offensive magazine?
Rodrick: I'm sorry, women.

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Bloofy: [Sings] Stomp like an elephant, scurry like a mouse, make your way down to Bloofy's house!
Anger: Please kill me.

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Pre-Hibernation Week / Life of Crime - S2-E13

SpongeBob: We'll spend the rest of our lives running. Running. But at least it's warm around the fire.
Patrick: Hey, if we're underwater, how can there be a...
[Fire goes out].

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The Secret Box / Band Geeks - S2-E14

Squidward: SpongeBob, I have a confession to make.
[Squidward takes shower cap off his head].
SpongeBob: [Squeals] You're... bald?
Squidward: No, I'm not bald! I'm alive!

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Miguel: Maybe they should call this place Chel Dorado.

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Aladdin: Do you trust me?
Jasmine: What?
Aladdin: Do you trust me?
Jasmine: Yes.

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Texas / Walking Small - S1-E18

[SpongeBob in the shape of Texas].
SpongeBob: Hey Patrick, what am I now?
Patrick: Uh, stupid?
SpongeBob: No, I'm Texas!
Patrick: What's the difference?
[Both laugh].

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SB-129 / Karate Choppers - S1-E14

Sandy: I love karate!
SpongeBob: I love kara-tay!
Mr. Krabs: I love money-ay!
Squidward: I hate all of you.

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Shrek: Aw, come here, you.
Donkey: All right, all right. Don't get all slobbery. No one likes to kiss ass.

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[Donkey looks for a blue flower with red thorns].
Donkey: Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns. This would be so much easier if I wasn't colorblind!

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Dinner for Four / Phoebe Skips - S4-E5

Rhonda: She asked you to do WHAT to my Caprini cardigan?
Lila: Snip the tags out?
[Helga grabs Lila].
Helga: Lila, what are you doing? You're not supposed to ask her!
Lila: I just didn't feel right about destroying Rhonda's personal property... without getting her permission first. It seemed, well, ever so wrong.
Helga: Yeah, well, guess what? You're ever so FIRED!
Lila: Thank you.

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Yzma: Pull the lever, Kronk.
[Kronk pulls a lever and Yzma falls through a trap door].
Yzma: WRONG LEVER!
Kronk: Uh oh.
Yzma: Why do we even have that lever?

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The Aptitude Test / Oskar Gets a Job - S3-E9

Suzie: I gave you 100 dollars two days ago.
Oskar: Suzie, you know I had to use it to pay the phone bill.
Suzie: Oskar, they cut off our phone service this morning.
Oskar: I know, it's a terrible mistake. We should sue.
Suzie: Oh, Oskar, that just doesn't make any sense.
Oskar: Tell me about it. So, can I have the 50 dollars?
Suzie: I don't have 50 dollars, we've already spent my paycheck this week.
Oskar: What about your overtime?
Suzie: I work 20 hours a week overtime already, how many more hours do you want me to work?
Oskar: How about 25?
Suzie: OSKAR!

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Helga: Move it, football head!

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Shrek: Quick! Tell a lie!
Pinocchio: Uh, what should I say?
Gingy: Anything, but quick!
Donkey: Say something crazy, like, I'm wearing ladies' underwear.
Pinocchio: I'm wearing ladies' underwear.
[Nose doesn't grow].
Shrek: [Laughs] Are you?
Pinocchio: I most certainly am not.
[Nose grows].
Donkey: It looks like you most certainly am are.
Pinocchio: Am not.
[Nose grows].
Puss in Boots: What kind?
Gingy: It's a thong!
Pinocchio: They're briefs!
Gingy: Are not!
Pinocchio: Are too!
Gingy: Are not!
Pinocchio: Are too!
[Nose continues to grow].

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Donkey: Mother?
[Fairy Godmother looks Shrek and Donkey].
Shrek: Uh, Mary, a talking horse!

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Lilo: Hello? Cobra Bubbles? Aliens are attacking my house.
Pleakley: No, no, no! No aliens!
Lilo: They want my dog.
Pleakley: There's no need to alert the authorities!
[Pleakley takes the phone from Lilo].
Pleakley: Everything's under control.
Cobra Bubbles: Lilo, who is that?
Lilo: Oh, good. My dog found the chainsaw.
Cobra Bubbles: Lilo! don't hang...
[Lilo hangs up].

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Stitch: Blue punch buggy! No punch back!

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The Aptitude Test / Oskar Gets a Job - S3-E9

Interviewer: You're kidding, right?
Arnold: No, it's not a joke, he really wants to work.
Interviewer: He's 38 years old, he's never had a job, and you expect me to hire him... as an X-ray technician? [Laughs].

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Jellyfishing / Plankton! - S1-E3

Plankton: Hear me Krabs, when I discover your formula for Krabby Patties, I'll run you out of business. I went to college!

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