Sex Drive (2008)

Randy: What's Up?
Andy: What's Up, what's up?
Randy: You wanna party?

Thug Prisoner: Hey! Hey ladies.
Lance: Hey how about you sit the fuck back down before me and you have a problem.
Thug Prisoner: How about you just, uh... chill out man. Be cool.
Lance: Alright we good?
Thug Prisoner: Yea, we're good.

Randy: Oh, what's up, what's up?
Andy: What's up what's up?

Ian: You don't know my brother, okay? He's gonna fuck my ass with a roll of quarters.
Ezekiel: What? He's gonna what? With what?
Ian: Oh, yeah! He's gonna go get off work early, and he's gonna walk into the bank, stand in line, change a 10, find my ass, and just... fuck it... with a roll of fucking quarters.

Rick: Ease it back, man. That donut ain't fuckin' around.

Randy: You wear thong underpants?
Andy: You want us to take our shirts off?
Randy: Where do you live?
Andy: Is your mom hot too?
Randy: Where do you live?
Andy: What's your address?
Randy: You like pizza?

Jogger: Hey, Knievel, what say you get your bike out of the fricking road?

Little Boy at Trailer Park: Weiner.

Ian: Is there a cock and ball on the front of me again?
Lance: Like a little tree trunk.

Andy: Why don'tcha take a picture Ian?
Randy: Yeah, and post it on total fucking awesomeness dot com.
Andy: Backslash we rule.
Randy: Wheredja come up with that?

Randy: We were just banging that chick in our car.
Female Cop: Yea, you mentioned that.
Andy: Yea, super hard.

Andy: Hey babe, you wanna party?
Girl Entering Party: I'm at a party.
Randy: You wanna make out with us?

Andy: You gotta get over the monkey.

Ian: Holy buckets... she wants me to give her the D.

Rex: I wouldn't let you drive The Judge if it was parked on my Schnutz.

Lance: It's like knives.

Ian: Hey, uh, can I ask you guys a question?
Randy: You just did.
Ian: Can I ask you guys another question?
Andy: You just did again.

Ian: There's no service out here. I can't even tell her I'll be late.
Lance: Good. That's perfect. Keep her waiting. You don't want to come off as desperate.
Ian: I'm driving nine hours. How am I not coming off desperate?
Lance: We had shit to do?

Lance: I can't believe I'm banging an Amish chick. I mean, seriously, what are the odds?

Rex: What smells like jizz?