Dean Wormer: Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life.
Katy: Boon, I think I'm in love with a retard.
Boon: Is he bigger than me?
Jennings: Teaching is just a way to pay the bills until I finish my novel.
Boon: How long you been workin' on it?
Jennings: Four and a half years.
Pinto: It must be very good.
Jennings: It's a piece of shit. Would anyone like to smoke some pot?
Hoover: They confiscated everything, even the stuff we didn't steal!
D-day: War's over, man. Wormer dropped the big one.
Bluto: Over? Did you say "over"? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!
Boon: Forget it, he's rolling.
Bluto: And it ain't over now. 'Cause when the goin' gets tough...the tough get goin'! Who's with me? Let's go!
[Runs out, alone, then returns.]
Bluto: What the fuck happened to the Delta I used to know? Where's the spirit? Where's the guts, huh?"Ooh, we're afraid to go with you Bluto, we might get in trouble." Well just kiss my ass from now on! Not me! I'm not gonna take this. Wormer, he's a dead man! Marmalard, dead! Niedermeyer...
Otter: Dead! Bluto's right. Psychotic, but absolutely right. We gotta take these bastards. Now we could do it with conventional weapons that could take years and cost millions of lives. No, I think we have to go all out. I think that this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody's part.
Bluto: We're just the guys to do it.
D-Day: Let's do it.
Bluto: LET'S DO IT!
Flounder: I can't believe I threw up in front of Dean Wormer.
Boon: Face it, Kent. You threw up "on" Dean Wormer.
Otter: Mrs. Wormer, I'm so glad you could come.
Marion Wormer: Cut the crap. Give me a drink.
Dean Wormer: The time has come for someone to put his foot down. And that foot...is me.