Sara: What did you have in mind?
Harris: Well, I was thinking of taking you on a cultural tour of L.A.
Sara: That's the first fifteen minutes, then what?
Harris: All right, a cynic. First stop is six blocks from here.
Sara: Why don't we walk?
Harris: Walk? A walk in L.A.?
Harris: I'm not kissing anyone hello anymore.
Trudi: Well just shake hands with them.
Harris: Are you kidding? I just wash my hands and I shake hands with some guy that feels like he's been squashing caterpillars.
Mr. Perdue, Maitre D' at L'Idiot: You think with a statement like this you can have the duck?
Chef: He can have the chicken.
Harris: So there I was jabbering at her about my new job as a serious newsman - about anything at all - but all I could think was wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, and most wonderful and yet again, wonderful.
Harris: Why is it that we don't always recognize the moment when love begins but we always know when it ends?
Roland: That's the difference between England and America. The English maintain civil relationships with their exes. Americans sue them.
Harris: A kiss may not be the truth, but it is what we wish were true.
Harris: I call it performance art, but my friend Ariel calls it wasting time. History will decide.
SanDeE: I'm studying to be a spokesmodel.
Harris: What is, what is a spokesmodel?
SanDeE: Um, it's just a model who speaks, you know, and she points at things like merchandise, you know, like a car or washer and dryer. Sometimes it's something really small, you know, like, like a book or fine art print.
Harris: They have classes for that?
SanDeE: Yeah, 'cause it's a lot harder than it looks.
