Ambassador Trentino: I've said enough, I'm a man of few words.
Rufus T. Firefly: I'm a man of one word: Scram.
Ambassador Trentino: Chicolini, your partner has deserted you but I'm still counting on you. There is a machine gun nest near Hill 28. I want it cleaned out.
Chicolini: All right, I'll tell the janitor.
Rufus T. Firefly: I got a good mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.
Mrs. Teasdale: Oh, I want to present to you Ambassador Trentino of Sylvania. Having him with us today is indeed a great pleasure.
Ambassador Trentino: Thank you, but I can't stay very long.
Rufus T. Firefly: That's even a greater pleasure.
Rufus T. Firefly: Well, maybe I am a little headstrong. But, I come by it honestly. My father was a little headstrong. My mother was a little armstrong. The headstrongs married the armstrongs and that's why darkies were born.
Rufus T. Firefly: Married. I can see you right now in the kitchen, bending over a hot stove. But I can't see the stove.
Bob Roland: Message from the front, sir.
Rufus T. Firefly: Oh, I'm sick of messages from the front. Don't we ever get a message from the side? - What is it?
Bob Roland: General Smith reports a gas attack. He wants to know what to do.
Rufus T. Firefly: Tell him to take a teaspoonful of bicarbonate baking soda and a half a glass of water.
Rufus T. Firefly: Here are the plans of war. They're as valuable as your life. And that's putting them pretty cheap. Watch them like a cat watched her kittens. Have you ever had kittens? No, of course not, you're too busy running around playing bridge. Can't you see what I'm trying to tell you, I love you.