Herman Blume: What's the secret, Max?
Max Fischer: The secret?
Herman Blume: Yeah, you seem to have it pretty figured out.
Max Fischer: The secret, I don't know... I guess you've just gotta find something you love to do and then... do it for the rest of your life. For me, it's going to Rushmore.
Max Fischer: How the hell did you get so rich? You're a quitter, man.
Herman Blume: I spent eight million dollars on this.
Max Fischer: And is that all you're willing to spend?
Dirk Calloway: I know about you and the teacher.
Max Fischer: I saved Latin. What did you ever do?
Rosemary Cross: Has it ever crossed your mind that you're far too young for me?
Max Fischer: It crossed my mind that you might consider that a possibility, yeah.
Herman Blume: Never in my wildest imagination did I ever dream I would have sons like these.
Herman Blume: What's his name again?
Dr. Nelson Guggenheim: Max Fischer.
Herman Blume: Sharp little guy.
Dr. Nelson Guggenheim: He's one of the worst students we've got.
Rosemary Cross: Do you think we're going to have sex?
Max Fischer: That's a kinda cheap way to put it.
Rosemary Cross: Not if you've ever fucked before, it isn't.
Herman Blume: She's my Rushmore.
Max Fischer: I know. She was mine too.
Dr. Peter Flynn: I didn't know we were going to dinner.
Max Fischer: Well, that's because you weren't invited.
Margaret Yang: You're a real jerk to me, you know that?
Max Fischer: I'm sorry, Margaret.
Margaret Yang: Well anyway, nice to see you.
Max Fischer: What do you call getting a handjob from Mrs. Calloway in the back of her Jaguar?
Magnus Buchan: A fucking lie.
Max Fischer: You think I got kicked out because of just the aquarium? Nah, it was the handjob. And you know what else? It was worth it.
Herman Blume: She's sweet, but she's fucked-up.
Ernie: What kind of fish?
Max Fischer: Barracuda, stingrays, electric eels, trout, hammerheads, piranha, giant squid, octopi.
Herman Blume: Piranhas? Really?
Max Fischer: Yes, I'm talking to a guy in South America.
Max Fischer: Sic transit gloria. Glory fades. I'm Max Fischer.
Rosemary Cross: Hi.
Max Fischer: Hi.
