Max Fischer: The truth is, neither one of us has the slightest idea where this relationship is going. We can't predict the future.
Rosemary Cross: We don't have a relationship.
Max Fischer: But we're friends.
Rosemary Cross: Yes, and that's all we're going to be. Well, yes.
Max Fischer: That's all I meant by "relationship." You want me to grab a dictionary?
Magnus Buchan: I always wanted to be in one of your fuckin' plays.
Max Fischer: War does funny things to men.
Max Fischer: Tell that stupid Mick he just made my list of things to do today.
Dirk Calloway: I know about you and the teacher.
Max Fischer: I saved Latin. What did you ever do?
Herman Blume: Never in my wildest imagination did I ever dream I would have sons like these.
Dr. Peter Flynn: I didn't know we were going to dinner.
Max Fischer: Well, that's because you weren't invited.