Jim Hardy: For that kinda of money you oughta be able to go by way o' Medicine Hat.
Ted Hanover: A gentle smile often breeds a kick in the pants.
Jim Hardy: Right now I've got the ledger in an iron lung.
Jim Hardy: I don't need a coat, now.
Linda Mason: You sound sweet, but you don't make sense.
Dance Extra: What is this the daisy chain?
Ted Hanover: Sorry, we're just looking for the back of a woman we don't know.
Ted Hanover: When a fellow is surprised to hear about his own wedding, brother that's when I go to work with a clear conscience.
Danny Reed: How'd he get that far in five minutes?
Ted Hanover: The lady must have been willing.
Danny Reed: The world can't do this to us.
Jim Hardy: What brings you here on this bright and uninviting day?
Danny Reed: Happy New Year.
Ted Hanover: Oh, don't do that.