Cooper Day: You gotta stop bein' the bunny and step up to the plate.
Abby Day: That's an absurd sentence.
Cooper Day: Absurd or brilliant?
Joey and the Dream Girl (2) - S1-E9
Michael: You're a hot girl. Hot girls get stuff for free.
Joey: Yeah, it's true. It's in the Constitution.
Alex: Look, I know what I am. I'm not a hot girl. I'm cute.
Michael: You're a hot girl that doesn't know she's hot. Joey was telling me about those.
Alex: No, I know hot girls. My sister is one of them.
Michael: "The even hotter sister" – one of four ways a girl doesn't realise she’s hot. Along with "went to a girls' school", "used to be fat", and "is blind."
Joey: You have learned well, young Michael.
Super Nanny - S2-E7
Super Nanny: What's going on here?
Toot: Oh, nothing. Captain Shero was just trying to take my barrette.
Captain Hero: It's pronounced Hero. The S is silent, you hithead.
The Penguin: Please, now that all pretenses are off, call me Penguin - a flightless bird, but one with style.
Paul: You know, sometimes a guys just gotta set the world on fire, hey Rolfy. I wonder if there's a nice bottle of rubbing alcohol around here, and a match.
Grant Wilson: It's you, you stupid cat. Your nose whistles.
Jude Harrison: Meatless meatloaf?.. Isn't that just loaf?
Gerry Standing: Will you stop creeping up on me.
Brian Lane: I don't creep, I glide.
Keely Teslow: She's in Indonesia.
Phil Diffy: You have your latitude and longitude mixed up. She's next to Kid Rock and Ricki Lake.
Keely Teslow: I know a shortcut through Tiger Woods.
Ari Gold: What the fuck are you wearing?
Lloyd: I'm trying out new looks! This one's my Andre 3000. You like?
Ari Gold: No, I don't. You look like Michelle Kwan in drag. Why don't you do a triple fucking axle over the phone and try calling Cameron again?
Alice: We need like, rules of un-attraction.
Donald Trump: It's a little bit like: watch somebody sell their used car and not wash it. You can spend $10 washing the car and get another $200 for the car. And I've seen guys, they're selling cars that are dirty, and I say, "That guy is a loser."
Leon Tyler: We need to cauterize the wound.
Thelma Bates: How do we do that?
Leon Tyler: Well, in star wars they used the light saber.