Harry Washello: I know how this sounds, but I answered the phone out there and the guy on the other end he was very, very frantic. He thought I was his dad for a minute, I think he just had the wrong area code.
Fred the Cook: Yeah, so what?
Harry Washello: So he was calling from a missile silo! He said that they were locked in, 50 minutes and counting, to shoot off their nuclear wad. We would be getting it back in an hour and 10. I mean he meant that we're at war! Nuclear war.
Mr. Bobrucz: You, Fifi, can take your French fruit and stuff it up your big bird.
Peter Plunkett: All I wanted to be was happily useless, you made me miserably useless.
Lorna: You are certifiable! What is this? Some sort of smart-ass joke? You're taking cooking?
Michael: I want to learn how to cook.
Lorna: Yeah, right. You have some burning desire to learn how to make apple brown betty.
Michael: What are you doing here if you think so highly of it?
Lorna: Well, they wouldn't let me take auto mechanics, and I didn't have time to take the issue to the Supreme Court.