Quotes from Mark Hamill movies and TV shows

The Joker: You know, kids, a lot has changed since your old Uncle Joker's been away. New Gotham, new rules, even a new Batman. But now I'm tanned, I'm rested and I'm ready to give this old town a wedgie again.

The Joker: Aren't you the nasty tattle-tale! Ratting me out before I've had my fun... Pappa spank.

Christmas With the Joker - S1-E38

Joker: Jingle bells, Batman smells. Robin laid an egg. The Batmobile lost a wheel and the Joker got awaaaaaaaaayyyyy.

The Strange Secret of Bruce Wayne - S1-E29

Two-Face: Get outta my face, clown.
The Joker: Which one?

Cubs Fan ★

The Joker: Yes, memory is so treacherous. One moment you're lost in a carnival of delight, childhood aromas, the flashing neon of puberty, all that sentimental candyfloss. The next, it takes you somewhere you don't want to be. Somewhere dark and cold, filled with damp, ambiguous-shaped things you'd rather forget. Memories can be vile, repulsive little brutes. Like children, no?

The Joker: I'm not exactly sure what happened. Sometimes I remember it one way, sometimes another. If I'm going to have a past, I prefer it to be multiple choice.

The Joker: Why aren't you laughing?
Bruce Wayne: Because I've heard it before. And it wasn't funny the first time.

The Joker: Well, that's what a dose of reality will do to you. It's why I never touch the stuff. I find it waters down the hallucinations.

Batgirl: Why are you doing this?
The Joker: To prove a point.

The Joker: You know, it's funny. This reminds me of a joke. See, there were two guys locked in a lunatic asylum and one night...one night, they decided they didn't like that anymore. They decided to escape. So, they made it up to the roof and there, just across this narrow gap, they see rooftops, stretching across town, stretching to freedom. Now, the first guy, he jumps right across, no problem. But his friend, oh, no way, he's afraid of falling. So, the first guy has an idea. He says, "Hey, I got this flashlight with me. I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings and you can walk across the beam and join me." But the second guy says, "What do you think I am, crazy? You'll just turn it off when I'm halfway across!"

Joseph: Will you forgive me, for thinking I was some miracle from God?
Judah: But you are a miracle. God sent you to save our family and all of Egypt. And you did.

Jacob: This is how you take charge? I trusted you to watch after Joseph. But you abandoned my son, my son!.
Judah: Aren't we your sons too?

Luke: How did my father die?
Obi-Wan: A young Jedi named Darth Vader, who was a pupil of mine until he turned to evil, helped the Empire hunt down and destroy the Jedi knights. He betrayed and murdered your father.

Ben Kenobi: Obi-Wan Kenobi? Obi-Wan. Now there's a name I've not heard in a long, long time. A long time.
Luke Skywalker: You do know him then?
Ben Kenobi: Of course I know him...he's me. I haven't gone by the name Obi-Wan since, oh, before you were born.

Luke Skywalker: I want to learn the ways of the force and become a Jedi, like my father.

Luke: I have a very bad feeling about this.

Luke Skywalker: Look, he's heading for that small moon.
Han Solo: I think I can get him before he gets there. He's almost in range.
Obi-Wan: That's no moon. It's a space station.

Luke Skywalker: Are you all right? What's wrong?
Obi-Wan Kenobi: I felt a great disturbance in the Force. As if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. I fear something terrible has happened.

Luke: All right, I'll give it a try.
Yoda: No. Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.

Darth Vader: Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father.
Luke Skywalker: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!
Darth Vader: No. I am your father!