Jane: That was yesterday. Today you're just the bitch who broke my heart and cut up my mother's wedding dress.
Jane: I think you should just admit that you're a big softy. That this whole cynical thing is just an act so that you can seem wounded, and mysterious, and sexy.
Kevin: Whoa whoa whoa. What was the last one?
Jane: What?
Kevin: Did you say sexy?
Jane: What?
Kevin: Do you think I'm sexy?
Jane: No.
Kevin: It's OK if you do.
Jane: I don't.
Kevin: Wait, what are those?
Jane: Nothing.
Kevin: Are those?
Jane: NO.
Kevin: Are they bridesmaid dresses?
Jane: This is none of your business!
Kevin: Ohhh... Good God. What, you kept them all? You have a whole closet full, why?
Jane: I have a lot of friends and I like to keep them.
Kevin: Right. Well, that makes complete sense because they're... Beautiful.
Jane: Some of them are not that bad.
Kevin: Not that bad? I'd like to see one of them that's not that bad.
Jane: I feel like I just found out my favorite love song was written about a sandwich.
Jane's Aunt: Must be so hard to watch your younger sister get married before you.
Jane: Yes. Then I remember that I still get to have hot hate sex with random strangers and I feel SO much better!
Jane: God, Casey, can't you keep it in your pants for one wedding?
Casey: Are you kidding? The only reason to wear this monstrous dress is that so some drunken groomsman can rip it to shreds with his teeth.
Jade: Bite me.
Alison Scott: I'm pregnant.
Ben Stone: Fuck off.
Alison Scott: What?
Ben Stone: What?
Alison Scott: I'm sorry I told you to fuck your bong.
Ben Stone: It's okay... I didn't.
Alison Scott: Why don't you go fuck your fucking bong you fuck.
Ben Stone: I will! I'll do it doggy style, too! For once.
Jack: We decided that, we want you to be on camera.
Alison Scott: Oh my god, really?
Jill: I know, I was so surprised too.
Holly Berenson: They love Sophie more than anything in they entire world, and out of everyone, Messer, they picked us.
Stephanie Plum: Ranger Manoso. He's like the statue of David by Michelangelo, if you dipped him in caramel and strapped some heat on him.
Glen: Next time we should go Danish - split it 60/60.
Lynn Sheridan: You mean 50/50.
Glen: What, you don't believe in tipping?
Romy White: Why am I the only one who sees how great I am?
Sarah Ryback: You take one more step and I'm dropping this grenade.
Travis Dane: Ok... then drop it.
