Quotes from Jennifer Coolidge movies and TV shows

Sam: We're supposed to be conserving water, we're in the middle of a drought.
Fiona: Droughts are for poor people. Do you think J.Lo has a brown lawn? People who use extra water have extra class!

White Bitch: God, I hate those fucking kids.

Paulette: So what's a girl to do? He's a guy who followed his pecker to greener pastures. I'm a middle aged, high school drop out with stretch marks and a fat ass.

Elle: That's great, Paulette. Is that the only interaction you two have ever had?
Paulette: No! Sometimes I say "okay" instead of "fine."

Elle: Did you see him? He's probably still scratching his head.
Paulette: Yeah, which must be a nice vacation for his balls.

Paulette: Who's ready to discharge?

Paulette: Ooh... the bend and snap! I did that last night naked. I broke a window though.