Theodore Ogelvie: You know something, Amos?
Amos Tucker: Huh?
Theodore Ogelvie: We got to make a decision.
Amos Tucker: What?
Theodore Oglivie: Does the Hash Knife Outfit throw in its hand? Or do we go out in a blaze of glory?
Amos Tucker: Right! Uh, just what do you mean... blaze of glory?
Theodore Oglivie: Fighting till the last man's killed! What's it going to be, pard?
Amos Tucker: You know that jail in Santa Fe wasn't all that bad.
Quotes from Don Knotts movies and TV shows
Mayor Turkey Lurkey: Well, other than the penny, this whole evening was a wash.
Luther Heggs: Calm? Do "murder" and "calm" go together? Calm and murder? Murder?
Luther Heggs: Mr. Boob, that's me. B double-O B - boob.
Luther Heggs: When you work with words, words are your work.
Luther Heggs: Well, me, I just don't happen to believe in ghosts... particularly.
Whitlow: I'm asking you a question, Heggs! Can't you curb your imagination for one minute?
Luther Heggs: Can't you curb your tongue for a minute?
Man in audience: Atta boy, Luther.
Mr. Uwatsum: How about a nice bowl of fish eyes?
Inspector Winship: Will you pardon me, please?
Mr. Uwatsum: Ah... Do you like hummingbird cookies?
Dr. Tart: ...No, thank you.
Inspector Winship: This isn't one of your better inventions. Who ever heard of a gun that went off every hour?
Dr. Tart: Might save your life someday.
Inspector Winship: Yeah, if you have to shoot someone every hour.
Inspector Winship: For a short person, you have long sentences.
Dr. Tart: You want another glass of pus?
Inspector Winship: No I don't want another glass of pus.
Donelli: Fleming, you've been here two weeks now, and I don't think your mind has been on your work for one second.
Roy Fleming: Uh, um, well to tell you the truth, sir, my heart really isn't in this.
Donelli: We are not interested in your heart, Fleming! We want your elbow grease.
Roy Fleming: Why is Pa always trying to run my life?
Mrs. Fleming: Well, after all, he was a corporal in World War I, and you know how bossy they were.
Roy Fleming: But, Ma, that war's been over for ages.
Mrs. Fleming: Not to your father. He loves that war just as much today as he did then.