Quotes from Dan Aykroyd movies and TV shows

Chip: Oh, please, Muffy. Not another crusade.

Mighty Mack: The suit's real neat, but do I have to wear the hat?
Elwood Blues: These are unsophisticated men. They only respond to fear and the draw of lucre. We elicit this by using iconographic symbols, and psychological intimidation. The way we look together presents a uniform image of strength and organization. Don't say anything. Look mean. No smiling.

Elwood Blues: Duck, give me a mountain tempo in A minor.

Elwood Blues: Stay away from drugs, gangs, and cyberporn on the Internet and you can be President of the United States some day.

Cab Chamberlain: I thought you said she was old and ugly.
Elwood Blues: Ix-nay on the ugly-ay.

Elwood Blues: We've got to get off this road. They've called ahead by now and you can't outrun a Motorola.

Elwood: It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses.
Jake: Hit it.

Elwood: What kind of music do you usually have here?
Bartender: Oh, we got both kinds, country AND western!

Elwood: They're not gonna catch us. We're on a mission from God.

Jimmy Flaherty: Prison won't be so bad. I can became a born-again Christian. And that'll be good. Because nobody wants a born-again Christian as their bitch.

Bishop73

Vic Frohmeyer: Nora Krank, we're here for Frosty.

Athletic Cone: I have learned much from watching the Garthok battle. It has weaknesses. I believe I can take it.
Beldar Conehead: Uh-huh. And let me know when Elvis gets here.

Beldar Conehead: An owner's manual to a Ford Lincoln Mercury Sable.
Highmaster: Ford Lincoln Mercury Sable?
Beldar Conehead: A personal conveyance named after its inventor, an assassinated ruler, a character from Greco-Roman myth and a small fur-covered mammal.
Highmaster: Ah.

Otto: Are you telling me you don't have a social security number?
Beldar Conehead: Correct.
Otto: Why not?
Beldar Conehead: I am an illegal alien.

Clifford Skridlow: Nothing can destroy the Doctor.

Clifford Skridlow: Do you have any idea how college faculty members eat? On what we get paid, a free meal is like honey to a bear to these people! They're going to want to eat enough to hibernate on! They're animals.

Friday: I wouldn't worry about the door, Muzz. The kind of scum who'd represent you would ooze right under it.

Movie Nut

Daisy Werthan: It's 7:16.
Boolie Werthan: You should have a job on the radio announcing the time.

Hoke Colburn: Oscar said you needin' somebody to drive for yo' family... now, what I'm 'on be doin'? Takin' your children to school, drivin' your wife to the beauty parlor?
Boolie Werthan: I don't have any children. Don't have the time.
Hoke Colburn: Aw, that's a shame! Course, you still a young man, so I wouldn't worry 'bout it too much.
Boolie Werthan: Thank you, I won't.

Boolie Werthan: You're a doodle, Mama.