[Dead Bill S. Preston almost falls down when climbing around in Hell.]
Dead Bill: Ted.
Dead Ted: Yeah?
Dead Bill: If I die, you can have my Megadeth collection.
Dead Ted: But, dude, we're already dead.
Dead Bill: Oh. Well then they're yours, dude.
Bill: You totally killed us, you evil metal dickweeds!
Both Bill and Ted: It's Colonel Oats! No way!
Colonel Oats: Gentlemen! Welcome to hell.
Ted: No way.
Colonel Oats: What!?!
Ted: No way...sir?
Colonel Oats: You two will do whatever I tell you to do from now on. Is that clear?
Bill: Yes, sir. Dude!
Colonel Oats: What!?!
Bill: Yes! Dude! Sir!
Colonel Oats: What!?!
Bill: Yes, sir! Sir! Dude!
Colonel Oats: Get down and give me infinity. Stupid, pathetic, craven little cretins.
Bill: Dude, there's no way I can possibly do infinity push-ups.
Ted: Maybe if he lets us do it girlie style.
Bill: Ted, while I agree that, in time, our band will be most triumphant, the truth is, Wyld Stallyns will never be a super band until we have Eddie Van Halen on guitar.
Ted: Yes, Bill. But, I do not believe we will get Eddie Van Halen until we have a triumphant video.
Bill: Ted, it's pointless to have a triumphant video before we even have decent instruments.
Ted: Well, how can we have decent instruments when we don't really even know how to play?
Bill: That is why we NEED Eddie Van Halen.
Ted: And THAT is why we need a triumphant video.
Bill/Ted: Excellent.
