Anthony: All that travel must cut into your home life.
Dr. Thornton Poole: Well, I don't spend as much time with mother as I'd like. But she's got the cats.
Snaps: Poole was right! You are an ox and a moron.
Connie: I got it! You daughter's not your daughter, and the cash that used to be the jewels is now your underwear.
Aldo: Breakfast is soived.
Snaps: "Served", you paluka.
Sophia: Now you fired the maid?
Snaps: No! She quit to marry Bruce Underwood.
Sophia: When did that happen?
Snaps: I don't know... somewhere between my vest and my pants.
Lisa Provolone: ...I wanna lay on the beach in Honolulu.
Snaps: Do whatever you want, just don't leave this room.
Snaps: If it's Poole you want, it's Poole you'll get. But, Lisa, you've got to cross the finish line on this one! This is your third fiance today and it ain't even lunch yet.
Lisa Provolone: You kept me a prisoner up here - like Rapunzel.
Snaps: Well, you certainly ain't Snow White.
Sophia: Look at the example you've set! Filling the house with thugs, goons, and hit men.
Snaps: All right... sometimes I had to bring my work home with me.
Snaps: Of course I knew. I just had no idea.
Snaps: Connie! Am-scray.
Connie: Do I have to, Boss? Every time I leave I fall behind.
Dr. Thornton Poole: Aldo is a treasure trove of linguistic anomolies.