Doris (TV Repairwoman): Are you crazy? You don't feed a baby chili.
Doris (TV Repairwoman): Butler, you got a problem with your horizontal hold?
Jack Butler: I don't know.
Doris (TV Repairwoman): Your wife says you do.
Jack Butler: Well, she ought to know... come on in.
Caroline: Look guys, take it easy on daddy. Remember, he's a rookie.
Jack Butler: Honey, you gave me some real good advice once, so let me give you some of my own. It's real easy to forget what's important, so don't."
Humphries: All of us here at Schooner Tuna sympathize with all of you hit so hard by these trying economic times. In order to help you, we are reducing the price of Schooner Tuna by 50 cents a can. When this crisis is over, we will go back to our regular prices. Until then, remember, we're all in this together. Schooner Tuna. The tuna with a heart.
Jack Butler: Kenny, don't paint your sister.
Jack Butler: Honey if you call and I'm not home I'll be at the gym or the gun club.