Linda Ash: You're married, aren't you?
Lenny Weinrib: How can you tell that?
Linda Ash: 'Cause you got that look.
Lenny Weinrib: "That look?" What... What look is that?
Linda Ash: That look like it's been a long time since you had a great blowjob.
Lenny Weinrib: You didn't see Schindler's List?
Kevin: No, no... That was the one with the Jews and the, um... Who were the bad guys?
Lenny Weinrib: The Nazis. The blond guys were the Nazis.
Kevin: They were tough motherfuckers.
Max: Who is the boss between you and mommy?
Lenny Weinrib: Who is the boss? You have to ask that? I'm the boss. Mommy is only the decision maker.
Kevin: I've had 16 fights and I won all of them but 12.
Linda Ash: You didn't want a blowjob so the least I could do is get you a tie.
Linda Ash: I feel like I owe you a great fuck.
Lenny Weinrib: Achilles only had an Achilles heel, I have an entire Achilles body.
Greek Chorus Leader: Don't go any further. I know what you're thinking, Lenny, and forget it!
Lenny Weinrib: I can't forget it; the thought's been put in my head.
Chorus: Oh, cursed fate; certain thoughts are better left unthunk.