The Last Boy Scout

Jimmy Dix: Ray, if we go any faster we're gonna travel back in time.

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Alley Thug: Wrong place, wrong time. Nothing personal.
Joe Hallenbeck: That's what you think. Last night I fucked your wife.
Alley Thug: Oh you did, hah? How'd you know it was my wife?
Joe Hallenbeck: She said her husband was a big pimp lookin' motherfucker with a hat.
Alley Thug: Oh, you're real cool for a guy about to take a bullet.
Joe Hallenbeck: After fucking your wife I'll take two.

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Joe Hallenbeck: Water is wet, the sky is blue, women have secrets.

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Jimmy Dix: Maybe I could take your daughter horseback riding. How old is she?
Joe Hallenbeck: She's 13, and if you even look at her funny I'm gonna shove an umbrella up your ass and open it.

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Mike Matthews: How long have we been friends?
Joe Hallenbeck: I'd say roughly until you started banging my wife.

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