Dr. Wynn: Now, for God's sake, he can't even drive a car.
Loomis: He was doing very well last night! Maybe someone around here gave him lessons.
Laurie: I killed him.
Tommy: You can't kill the boogeyman!
Tommy: But I saw the boogeyman! I saw him.
Laurie: Okay, what did he look like?
Tommy: Umm... the boogeyman.
Tommy: Laurie, what's the boogeyman?
Laurie: There's no such thing.
Marion: Don't you think it would be better if you referred to "it" as "him"?
Loomis: If you say so.
Marion: Your compassion's overwhelming, Doctor.
Laurie: Lynda, if this is a joke, I'll kill you.
Graveyard Keeper: Yeah, you know every town has something like this happen... I remember over in Russellville, old Charlie Bowles, about fifteen years ago... One night, he finished dinner, and he excused himself from the table. He went out to the garage, and got himself a hacksaw. Then he went back into the house, kissed his wife and his two children goodbye, and then he proceeded to.
Loomis: Where are we?
Graveyard Keeper: Eh? Oh, it's, uh, right over here.
Lynda: Now, when we get inside, Annie will distract Lindsey and we go upstairs to the first bedroom on the right. Got it?
Bob: First, I rip your clothes off.
Lynda: Don't rip my blouse. It's expensive, you idiot.
Bob: Then I rip my clothes off, then I rip Lindsey's clothes off. Yeah, I think I got it.
Lynda: So Annie, are we still on for tonight?
Annie: I wouldn't want to get you in deep trouble, Lynda.
Lynda: Oh, come on, Annie! Bob and I have been planning it for weeks.
Annie: All right, the Wallaces leave at seven.
Laurie: I'm babysitting the Doyles, it's two houses down. We can keep each other company.
Annie: Oh, terrific. I've got three choices: watch the kid sleep, listen to Lynda screw around, or talk to you.
Brackett: Every kid in Haddonfield thinks this place is haunted.
Loomis: They may be right.
Tommy: It's the boogeyman! The boogeyman's outside.
Laurie: Oh, Tommy, stop it! You're scaring Lindsey. There's nobody out there. Now, if you don't stop this I'm going to have to turn the TV off and send you to bed.
Tommy: Nobody believes me.
Lindsey: I believe you, Tommy.
Laurie: Tommy, unlock the door! Come here, now you listen to me. I want you to go down the stairs, and out the front door. I want you to go down the street to the Mackenzie's house. I want you to tell them to call the police and tell them to send them over here. Now, do you understand me? Go do as I say.
Laurie: Sleep tight, kids.