Sideways
Movie Quote Quiz

Jack: Do not drink too much. Do you hear me? I don't want you passing out or going in the dark side. No going in the dark side.
Miles Raymond: Okay.

Stephanie: You're getting married on Saturday?

Jack: Listen, honey. Let me call you right back. Miles and I are in the middle of something. No, it's nothing serious, Miles is just having one of his freak-outs. Yeah. Love you too.

Jack: Somebody had to do the talking. And by the way, I was right. She's not married.
Miles Raymond: How do you know?
Jack: No rock. When she came to the bar, sans rock.

Miles Raymond: Hey, what should I wear?
Jack: I don't know, something casual but nice. They think you're a writer.

Jack: Consult your doctor before using this product. Side effects may include oily discharge, hives, loss of appetite, low blood pressure. If you have diabetes or a history of kidney trouble, you're dead, asshole.

Cammi: And here are your handy wipes.
Jack: Oh, so that's what these are. For a minute there I thought you guys were promoting safe sex.

Miles Raymond: Yeah, right. Yup, I'm a homo. Yeah. Yeah. Just make up whatever you want and that's what happened. Okay? Write out my gay confession and I'll sign it. Okay? Just stop pushing me all the time. You're an infant, Jack. This is all a big party for you... but not for me.

Maya: What's the title?
Miles Raymond: The Day After Yesterday.
Maya: Oh... You mean today?

Jack: I'm trying to get you a little action, I'd appreciate a little help.

Jack: This chick Stephanie, she's got it all goin' on.
Miles Raymond: Well, she is cute, yeah.
Jack: Cute? She's a fuckin' hottie. And you almost tell her that I'm gettin' married? What's the matter with you?

Jack: Bet ya that chick's two tons of fun. You know, the grateful type?

Miles Raymond: A little citrus. Maybe some strawberry. Mmm. Passion fruit, mmm, and, oh, there's just like the faintest soup├žon of like, uh, asparagus, and, there's a, just a flutter of, like a, like a nutty Edam cheese.

Jack: Yo! Yo! Here's my boy! Here's my boy! But who's your daddy? Now who is your daddy?
Miles Raymond: Put me down, Jack.
Jack: I'm so proud of you! Let me love you! So tell me everything. Details. I like details.
Miles Raymond: No.
Jack: What?
Miles Raymond: It's private.
Jack: You're kidding, right? Tell me what happened, you fucker, or I'll tie your dick in a knot.
Miles Raymond: Let's leave it alone.
Jack: You didn't get any, did you? You're a homo.

Maya: So, what gems do you have in your collection?
Miles Raymond: Oh, its not much of a collection. I mean, its more like a small gathering in a cabinet. I-I've never really had the wallet for that. I just have to live bottle to bottle.

Jack: Speak for yourself. I get chicks lookin' at me all the time. All ages. Dudes too.
Miles Raymond: Well, it's not worth it. You pay too big a price. It's never free.
Jack: You need to get laid, Miles. You know what? That's going to be my best man gift to you this week. I'm gonna get you laid.
Miles Raymond: Wonderful.
Jack: I'm not gonna get you a gift certificate or a pen knife or any of that other horse shit.
Miles Raymond: I'd rather have a knife.

Jack: You gotta help me! You gotta help me.

Mike Erganian: What is the subject of your book? Non fiction?
Miles Raymond: Uh, no. It's... it's a novel. Fiction. Yes. Although there is quite a bit from my own life... so I suppose that, technically some of it is nonfiction.
Mike Erganian: Good I like non fiction. There is so much to know about this world. I think you read something somebody just invented, waste of time.
Miles Raymond: That's an interesting perspective.

Jack: Are you still seeing that shrink?
Miles Raymond: I saw him on Monday. I spent most of the time helping him with his computer.
Jack: Well, I say, fuck therapy. And what is that stuff you take... Xanax?
Miles Raymond: And Lexapro, yes.
Jack: Well, I say, fuck that too. You need to get your joint worked on, Miles.

Miles Raymond: Now the cards are on the table.
Jack: Yes, they are.

Sideways mistake picture

Continuity mistake: When Jack and Miles pull up to the house to retrieve the wallet, one of the drapes is pulled back in the front window. When Miles walks up to the house, both drapes are drawn over the window.

More mistakes in Sideways

Trivia: When Miles is stealing money from his mother he looks at the pictures on her dresser. One of the pictures is of Miles and his Dad. It is actually Miles real dad. Miles is played by Paul Giamatti and his dad is Bart Giamatti former Commissioner of Baseball. That is who is in the picture smiling with Miles.

More trivia for SidewaysMore movie quotes

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