Clarence Worley: I always said, if I had to fuck a guy... I mean had to, if my life depended on it... I'd fuck Elvis.
Clarence Worley: You just said you love me, now if I say I love you and just throw caution to the wind and let the chips fall where they may and you're lying to me I'm gonna fuckin' die.
Coccotti: I haven't killed anybody since 1984. Goddamn his soul to burn for eternity in fucking hell for making me get my hands dirty. Go over to this comedian's son's apartment, come back with something that tells me where that asshole went, so I can wipe this egg off my face and finish this fucked-up family for good.
Vincenzo Coccotti: We're gonna have a little Q&A, and at the risk of sounding redundant, please... make your answers genuine.
Drexl Spivey: Marty. Y'know what we got here? Motherfuckin' Charlie Bronson. Mr. Majestyk.
Alabama: Please shut up! I'm trying to come clean, okay? I've been a call-girl for exactly four days and you're my third customer. I want you to know that I'm not damaged goods. I'm not what they call Florida white trash. I'm a good person and when it comes to relationships, I'm one-hundred percent, I'm one hundred percent... monogamous.
Alabama: Okey dokey doggie daddy.
Drexl Spivey: They got everything here from a diddled-eyed joe to damned if I know.
Floyd: Don't condescend me, man. I'll fuckin' kill ya, man.
Elliot: Hi. How are you? My name's Elliot, and I'm with the Cub Scouts of America. We're... we're selling uncut cocaine to get to the jamboree.
Coccotti: Now, what we got here is a little game of show and tell. You don't wanna show me nothing but you're telling me everything.
Mentor: You think a cop gives a fuck about a pimp? Listen. Every pimp in the world gets shot. Two in the back of the fuckin' head. Cops'd throw a party, man.
Drexl Spivey: Now I know I'm pretty, but I ain't as pretty as a couple of titties.
Mentor: I like you, Clarence. Always have. Always will.
Mentor: I gotta hand it to you Clarence.
Clarence Worley: I was cool?
Mentor: Naw man you were cooler than cool.
Alabama: Did I do my part okay?
Clarence Worley: Bamaloo you were perfect.
Alabama: Like a ninja?
Clarence Worley: Like a ninja.
Big Don: I eat the pussy, I eat the butt, I eat every motherfuckin' thang.
Clarence Worley: Eliot, do I look like a beautiful blonde with big tits and an ass that tastes like French vanilla ice cream?
Elliot: What?
Clarence Worley: I said do I look like a beautiful blonde with big big tits and an ass that tastes like French vanilla ice cream?
Elliot: No.
Clarence Worley: No. Okay, then why are you telling me all this bullshit, huh? You wanna fuck me?
Floyd: Hey! Get some beer and some cleaning products.
Clarence Worley: I mean, she... she a four alarm fire or what?
