The Girl: You're married. I knew it! You look married.
Richard Sherman: 'What happened at the office? Well, I shot Mr. Brady in the head, made violent love to Miss Morris and set fire to three hundred thousand copies of Little Women. That's what happened at the office.' What can happen at the office?
The Girl: Hey, did you ever try dunking a potato chip in champagne? It's real crazy.
The Girl: Do you have any kids?
Richard Sherman: No. None. No kids. Well, just one. Little one. Hardly counts.
The Girl: I think it's wonderful that you're married! I think it's just elegant.
Dr. Brubaker: When something itches my dear sir, the natural tendency is to scratch.
Richard Sherman: Last night I scratched.
Richard Sherman: Good old Rachmaninov. The Second Piano Concerto. Never misses.
The Girl: I had onions at lunch. I had garlic dressing at dinner. But he'll never know, because I stay kissing sweet, the new Dazzledent way.
The Girl: I posed for this picture and when it was published in U.S. Camera, they got all upset... It was one of these 'artistic' pictures... it was on the beach with some driftwood. It got Honorable Mention... It was called Textures, because you could see three different kinds of texture: the driftwood, the sand and me. I got $25 dollars an hour, and it took hours and hours. You'd be surprised.
Richard Sherman: Tell me doctor, are you very expensive?
Dr. Brubaker: Very.
Richard Sherman: I'm sure you occasionally make exceptions.
Dr. Brubaker: Never.
Richard Sherman: Well I mean, once in a while, a case must come along that really interests you.
Dr. Brubaker: At fifty dollars an hour, all my cases interest me.
The Girl: A stairway to nowhere! I think that's just elegant.
Richard Sherman: My wife. She found out about us and she shot me. Five times in the back and twice in the belly.
Dr. Brubaker: My 3:00 patient jumped out of the window in the middle of his session. I have been running fifteen minutes ahead of schedule ever since.
The Girl: I just hope it's not some priceless antique or something.
Richard Sherman: Forget it. Just early Sears, Roebuck.
Dr. Brubaker: Until you are able to commit a simple act of terror, I strongly advise you to avoid anything as complex as murder.
The Girl: When it gets hot like this, you know what I do? I keep my undies in the icebox.
Tom MacKenzie: What blonde in the kitchen?
Richard Sherman: Wouldn't you like to know! Maybe it's Marilyn Monroe.