Sally Owens: Louis L'amour, who, by the way, was not a foreigner! He was from North Dakota, you asshole.
Gary Hallet: So what kind of, uh... craft do you do?
Sally Owens: I manufacture bath oils and soaps... hand lotions... shampoo. And the Aunts, um... they like to meddle in people's love lives.
Gary Hallet: You're saying what I'm feeling is just one of your spells?
Sally Owens: Yeah. It's not real. And if you stay, I wouldn't know if it was because of the spell and... you wouldn't know if it was because I didn't want to go to prison.
Gary Hallet: Yeah, well... you know, all relationships have problems.
Sally Owens: And I don't want them dancing naked under the full moon.
Aunt Jet Owens: No, of course. The nudity is entirely optional. As you well remember.
Sally Owens: Can love really travel back in time and heal a broken heart? Was it our joined hands that finally lifted Maria's curse? I'd like to think so. But there are some things I know for certain: always throw spilt salt over your left shoulder, keep rosemary by your garden gate, plant lavender for luck, and fall in love whenever you can.
Children: Witch! Witch! You're a bitch! Witch! Witch! You're a bitch.
Sally Owens: You'd think after three hundred years they'd come up with a better rhyme.