Quotes from Julian Barratt movies and TV shows

Vince Noir: Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard... Howard?
Howard Moon: This better be good.
Vince Noir: You know the black bits in bananas, are they tarantulas' eggs?
Howard Moon: Please don't speak to me ever again in your life.

Old Gregg: What do you think of me?
Howard Moon: I don't rightly know, Sir.
Old Gregg: Make an assessment.

Vince Noir: I hate jazz.
Howard Moon: You hate jazz? You fear jazz! You fear the lack of rules. Skiddly biddly dee wop ba-wow.
Vince Noir: Stop it.
Howard Moon: Bop. Dah wop, skiddly doo wah.
Vince Noir: Stop THE evil.

Howard Moon: I want to be the greatest Jazz player in Yorkshire.
The Spirit of Jazz: Yorkshire? What is Yorkshire?
Howard Moon: Yorkshire is a place. Yorkshire is a state of mind.

Howard Moon: I don't accessorize. I'm Howard Moon. There's a simple truth to me.

Howard Moon: Just imagine the headlines 'Howard Moon, Colon, Explorer'. Got a ring to that don't it?
Vince Noir: Colon Explorer?
Howard Moon: You know what I saying.
Vince Noir: I think that's got the wrong ring to it.

The Spirit of Jazz: Ow! My hat's on fire! What's wrong with you? You blind? Why didn't ya tell me?
Howard Moon: Sorry, I thought that was your look.

Howard Moon: I'm an explorer.
Vince Noir: I thought you were a writer?
Howard Moon: I do many things. I span the genres - they call me the genre spanner.
Vince Noir: Yeah, they call you the spanner.