Quotes from Josh Duhamel movies and TV shows

Karen Westlake: I will put you in witness protection. The feds will keep safe.
Jeremy Coleman: So my whole life just... just goes away?
Mike Cella: You get to keep your first name.

Jeremy Coleman: I need you to trust me. Do everything that I ask and I promise we'll survive this. Do you trust me?
Talia Durham: Yes.

Eric Messer: If me at any age of my life could see me right now he would kick my cat ass, you know that?

Eric Messer: So I'm at the drug store and it dawns on me that women stare at men carrying a baby like a guy will stare at a woman with a great rack.

Eric Messer: Just because you accept help from someone, doesn't mean you have failed. It just means you're not in it alone.

Alex: Grab a book!
Lexie: Yeah, they'e really good books.
Alex: How do you know, you didn't read any of them.

Alex: You know normally when someone does something nice, you just say thank you.

Josh: Why do you have to take pictures?
Alex: I don't know Josh, maybe cause I want to be able to remember this stuff.

Roger: Well, the weather report's wrong.
Alex: They have instruments for this: thermometers, barometers, tons of other crap. You have an arthritic knee.

Sergeant Epps: I hope these F-16's got good aim.
Major Lennox: Why's that?
Sargeant Epps: Because I told them to hit the orange smoke.
Major Lennox: You mean that orange smoke? [Points to orange smoke right next to them.]
Sargeant Epps: It wasn't my best toss.

Pru: This song is so nasty.
Alex: What are they saying?
Pru: I'm not getting it all, but basically it's a long list of explicit things he likes to do in the back of his car, one being up the ass.

Beth: It's like, I meet a guy, and I think it's great, and anyone else would just be thinking about how much greater it's going to get. And I'm constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Nick: You know, lightning does strike once in a while, Beth. Trust me, I know.