The Silence of the Hams

The Silence of the Hams (1994)

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Dwarf Guard: Dr. Animal's intelligence goes beyond the borders of the human mind. His savagery goes beyond the borders of the animal.
Joe: How could he go beyond so many borders without a passport?

Antonio: The tension was so thick, and the music so pretentious, they knew they must be getting close.

Antonio: "Alone, on a private plane, Agent Joe finally decides" oh no, wait, wait, forget it... sorry, this scene was cut.

Antonio: This is not a motel called "Cemetery." This is a cemetery called "Motel."

Dr. Animal: What are you most afraid of?
Jo: Anchovies.
Dr. Animal: Good answer.

Antonio: I have to go and take a shower, because I smell like Kevin Costner after "Dances with wolves."

Jane: What did you say your name was?
Olaf: Olaf. I'm Swedish.
Jane: Oh, come on. Are you really Swedish?
Olaf: No, not quite. My father's Finnish, and my mother's Russian.
Jane: I could tell.

Michael Jackson: My arm! My arm.

Mother: My son is alive? Who the fuck did I kill?

Detective Martin Balsam: Oh, no! Not again.

Dr. Animal: The killer's name is Antonio and he hates his mother.
Joe: Why?
Dr. Animal: Maybe 'cause she's a pain in the ass! Did you ever think about that?

Visible crew/equipment: At the end of the movie, as everyone reveals who they really are, when the girl reveals herself to actually be Detective Putrid you can see a hand reach up behind him and place his hat on his head. It could have been an intentional joke for the hat to suddenly float onto his head, but the hand probably wasn't supposed to be there.

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