Baravelli: You gotta brother?
Baravelli: You gotta sister?
Baravelli: Well-a, you sister, she's a very sick man, you better come with us.
Mullen: Yeah? What happened to her?
Baravelli: She hadda accident in her automobile.
McCarthy: Ah, she has no automobile.
Baravelli: Well-a, maybe she's-a fall off-a horse. I don't-a look very close. Come on, we take you in our car.
Mullen: You will, eh? Well, I have no sister.
Baravelli: That's all right. We no gotta car. Come on.
Professor Wagstaff: Listen, madame, you've gotta give my son up.
Connie: Give him up?
Professor Wagstaff: You can't take him from me. He's all I've got in the world except a picture of George Washington crossing the Delaware.
Connie: But, Professor, I.
Professor Wagstaff: Whatever you say is a lie. He's only a shell of his former self, which nobody can deny. Whoopee.
Professor Wagstaff: I tell you, you're ruining that boy. You're ruining him. Why can't you do as much for me?
Professor Wagstaff: What's all this talk I hear about you fooling around with the college widow? No wonder you can't get out of college. Twelve years in one college! I went to three colleges in twelve years and fooled around with three college widows. When I was your age I went to bed right after supper. Sometimes I went to bed before supper. Sometimes I went without my supper and I didn't go to bed at all. A college widow stood for something in those days. In fact she stood for plenty.
Professor Wagstaff: In case I never see you again, which would add ten years to my life, what would you fellas want to play football?
Baravelli: Well, first we want a football.
Professor Wagstaff: Well, I don't know if we've got a football, but if I can find one, would you be interested? I don't want a hasty answer, just sleep on it.
Baravelli: I no think I can sleep on a football.