Cecil: No one gets laid until we've finished our movie. We're horny, but our film comes first.
Cecil: Death to mainstream cinema.
Cecil: Action Fans! Help us.
Honey: I am ready for my close-up, Mr. Demented.
Cecil: I have a vision.
Honey: No! Please let me go! I promise I won't tell anyone about your little movie.
Honey: I didn't mean, you know, little. I meant, you know, low-budget... ly cult.
Dinah: Hey! We're not union! And we're takin' over this movie.
Cecil: I'm a prophet against profit.
Cecil: I am Cecil B. Demented! And this is a fucking kidnapping.
Honey: Family is just a dirty word for censorship.
Sniffles: Nobody here but us whackers.
Honey: Raven, you know, you're a really pretty girl. You could escape from all of this madness.
Raven: Escape to what, Honey? I mean, my father is Zo-Zo, the three headed guard dog at the gate to hell.
Honey: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Honey: I fucking hate Forrest Gump.
Cecil: Celibacy for celluloid.
Cecil: I'm Cecil B. Demented, and you're in my movie. Do not look into the lens and ruin the shot or you will be shot.
Petie: Tell me about Mel Gibson's dick and balls.
Raven: Pain is pleasure! Slavery is freedom! Suicide for Satan.
Honey: How can you be a drug addict in the new millennium? It's so retro.
Lyle: Before I was a drug addict, I had so many different problems. Now I just have one - drugs! Gave my life a real focus.
Cecil: There are no rules in underground cinema, only edges.