Being John Malkovich
Movie Quote Quiz

Maxine: Meet you in Malkovich in one hour.

Craig Schwartz: You don't know how lucky you are being a monkey. Because consciousness is a terrible curse. I think. I feel. I suffer. And all I ask in return is the opportunity to do my work. And they won't allow it... because I raise issues.

John Malkovich: The weird thing is, this Maxine likes to call me "Lotte."
Charlie: Ouch. That is hot. Maybe she's using you to channel some dead lesbian lover. Sounds like my kind of gal. Let me know when you're done with her, yeah?
John Malkovich: What are you talking about, "Done with her", man? Tonight really freaked me out.

Charlie: Hot lesbian witches! It's fucking genius.

John Malkovich: Ma-Sheen.
Charlie: Malcatraz.

Craig Schwartz: Nobody's looking for a puppeteer in today's wintry economic climate.

Charlie: You're nuts to let a girl go that calls you Lotte, I tell you that as a friend.

Craig Schwartz: I was thinking about what you were saying the other day, about the orientation film being bullshit.
Maxine: Yes?
Craig Schwartz: I think maybe you're on to something.
Maxine: And fifty other lines to get into a girl's pants.

Dr. Lester: My spunk is to you manna from heaven.

John Malkovich: I have seen a world that no man should see.
Craig Schwartz: Really? Because for most people it's a rather enjoyable experience.

Dr. Lester: Any questions?
Craig Schwartz: Just one. Why are these ceilings so low?
Dr. Lester: Low overhead, my boy - we pass the savings on to you! But seriously, that'll all be covered in the orientation.

Maxine: Have you ever had two people look at you, with complete lust and devotion, through the same pair of eyes?

Craig Schwartz: I've fallen in love, and this is what people who've fallen in love look like.
Maxine: Well, you picked the unrequited variety. It's very bad for the skin.

Craig Schwartz (in John Malkovich): You see, Maxine, it isn't just playing with dolls.
Maxine: You're right, my darling, it's so much more. It's playing with people.

Maxine: Here's the thing: If you ever get me, you wouldn't have a clue what to do with me.

Craig Schwartz (in John Malkovich): There is truth, and there are lies, and art always tells the truth. Even when it's lying.

Maxine: Craig, I don't find you attractive, but Lotte, I'm smitten with you. I am... but only when you're in Malkovich. When I was with him last night, I was looking into his eyes and could sense your feminine longing.

Dr. Lester: I've been very lonely in my isolated tower of indecipherable speech.

Continuity mistake: When Craig first discovers the portal door his crouching position changes slightly between the camera shot inside the tunnel and that from the office, and again when he closes the office door and goes back to the portal door.

Paul Andrews

More mistakes in Being John Malkovich

Question: What is the song played around the end of the main trailer? It sounds a lot like the theme from Brazil if that helps.

Answer: It IS from Brazil. The song is called Brazil, performed by Geoff Muldaur.

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