Captain Dickson: This is bullshit! Waiter, can a black man get some water?
Schmidt: Someone get the fucking man some water. He's black, he's been through a lot.
Deputy Chief Hardy: The Koreans bought the church back, so we had to move across the street... To 22 Jump Street.
Captain Dickson: Hey, you two stop dicking around!
Captain Dickson: Congratulations, you managed to un-fuck a situation you originally already fucked up!
Captain Dickson: I wish I could have you un-fuck my daughter but I'll let that be in the past. Now you two, for your next mission, you two sons of bitches going to medical school!