Larry: This is so not worth $11.50 an hour.
Jack Sparrow: Oi fish face! I've got a jar of dirt! I've got a jar of dirt! Guess what's inside of it?.
Girl Patient: My mom's last boyfriend was bald. He was nice, but she didn't marry him.
Kate: No?
Girl Patient: There's always something better coming around the corner. That's what she says.
Kate: If she's not careful, she can spend her whole life waiting.
Nita's Father: Once you love someone, they stay in your heart forever.
News Reader in 2017: Michael Jackson, the first man to clone himself is now suing himself for molesting himself.
Lex Luthor: Gods are selfish beings who fly around in little red capes and don't share their power with mankind.
Aquamarine: But I've learned it's not where you are, it's who you're with.
Ackerman: We'll have to dress it up a little. Disguise it. Give them enough reason to doubt it.
Jack Frost: Would you like to be my elf?
Sylvia Newman: Huh?
Jack Frost: You heard me.
Professor Jules Hilbert: The last thing to determine conclusively is whether you're in a comedy or a tragedy.To quote Italo Calvino, "The ultimate meaning to which all stories refer has two faces: the continuity of life, the inevitability of death." Tragedy, you die. Comedy, you get hitched.
Victor: Now, I think we'd better go inside before we become a tourist attraction.
Jessica Wilhern: Penelope, just one man, one man.
Penelope: And he'll run too! They always run. Why can't you accept that? For seven years I've been watching them run. Do you have any idea how that makes me feel? Do you?
Jessica Wilhern: I'm sorry, but we just can't quit.
Penelope: We can, because no matter how much I want to believe there's one man who won't run away, one man who... who.
Mikal: Where are you going?
Eugene: East-ish.
Mikal: East-ish?
Shoshana Cox: I have a question for the Supreme Court. What happens when a woman has sex on a flight from London to Los Angeles, then takes the morning-after pill while flying across the time zone?
Krysta Now: I don't know.
Shoshana Cox: Then it becomes the morning-before pill.
Deena Storm: You are a genius.
Shoshana Cox: Hello. Can't answer to that.
Krysta Now: Holy shit. That is brilliant.
Robin: Starfire, you know your my best friend.
Starfire: And you're mine.
Templeton: Have you seen the pig next door? I think his mama was part hippo. If I had to name five of the fattest pigs I've ever seen, he'd be three of them.
Stephane: I am your neighbor and a liar. By the way, do you have Zoe's number?
Judson: The location of King Solomon's mines must never be found.