Bert: Speaking of names, I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith.
Uncle Albert: What's the name of his other leg?
Rudolph: What do you want?
Clarice: You - You promised to walk me home.
Rudolph: Aren't you going to laugh at my nose, too?
Clarice: I think it's a handsome nose. Much better than that silly false one you were wearing.
Rudolph: It's terrible... and it's different from everybody else's.
Clarice: But that's what makes it so grand. Why, any doe would consider herself lucky to be with you.
Rudolph: Yeah? But I wasn't very lucky today, was I?
Little John: When your opponent's sittin' there holding all aces, there's only one thing left to do: Kick over the table.
President Merkin Muffley: Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room!
Miriam: Why wouldn't I tell him that his pure, darling little girl was having a dirty little affair with a married man?
Charlotte: You're a vile, sorry little bitch.
Molly Brown: Sure I may be tuckered, and I may give out, but I won't give in.
Lucky Jackson: Where you from, Rusty?
Rusty Martin: Dubuque.
Lucky Jackson: Well whaddya know, I've never been there myself, but its interesting that you're from good old Dubuque.
Rusty Martin: Before you get too attached to 'good old Dubuque', we moved there from Chillicothe, Ohio.
Rusty Martin: Chillicothe, Ohio, well, how about that, I've never been there either.
Clint Stark: I was like you once, long time ago. I believed in the dignity of man. Decency. Humanity. But I was lucky. I found out the truth early, boy.
Ed Cunningham: And what is the truth, Stark?
Clint Stark: It's all very simple. There's no such thing as the dignity of man. Man is a base, pathetic and vulgar animal.