Phaneron

Tree House of Horror X - S11-E4

Professor Frink: In episode BF12, you were battling barbarians while riding a winged Appaloosa. but in the very next scene, my dear, you're clearly atop a winged Arabian. Please to explain it.
Lucy Lawless: Ah, yeah, well, whenever you notice something like that, a wizard did it.
Professor Frink: I see, all right, yes, but in episode AG4...
Lucy Lawless: Wizard!
Professor Frink: Ah, for glavin' out loud!

Phaneron ★

He Said, She Said - S3-E4

Mr. Turner: Hey George, what's up?
Mr. Feeny: Well, I just wanted to be sure you knew that the Hunter boy missed his history test this morning.
Mr. Turner: He what?
Cory: Oh, that's my fault, my fault. I was supposed to tell you that Shawn had a severe case of, uh, help me out here.
Mr. Feeny: Sloth?
Cory: Yes, Hong Kong sloth.

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What I Meant To Say - S3-E3

Mr. Williams: I'm here to teach you to find the truth in the media. Because there is a difference between what they say, and what is real.
Mr. Turner: That was very good. Watch this: Hunter, what did he just say?
Shawn: Something about Israel.

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What I Meant To Say - S3-E3

Mr. Turner: Matthews, Hunter, stand up.
Shawn: I didn't do it.
Mr. Turner: Get up. Hunter, who's your best friend?
Shawn: You are, sir!

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What I Meant To Say - S3-E3

Mr. Turner: Man, I'm sorry, Eli. I still think you would've made a great teacher though, man.
Mr. Williams: Why? I mean, I have nothing to say to kids. I don't even understand kids.
Mr. Turner: But you know how to communicate, man, and you know how to do it honestly.
Mr. Williams: And that's what got me fired from producing the 6 o'clock news. I'm trying to show people what's really going on with slumlords in Philadelphia, and the station manager is saying "Well, let's see more of that woman that walks to work naked."

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Back 2 School - S2-E1

Frankie: Hey! [Picks Cory up and slams him against locker.]
Cory: What'd I do!?
Frankie: You were almost in my way.
Cory: [Looks over notes] You're Frankie Stecchino, right?
Frankie: Yeah, how'd you know?
Cory: [Reading notes] "Strong territorial sense."
Shawn: We were just looking for our homeroom.
Joey: [Points at locker] It's in there.
Shawn: In there?
Joey: Right there.
Shawn: Thank you. Thank you very much. [Opens locker] Hey, I'm the first one here. [Gets in locker and closes it.]
Frankie: And now for you. Why was you almost in my way?
Cory: You know, if I was in my homeroom, I wouldn't be anywhere near your way.
Frankie: Huh?
Joey: I think he's saying that if he was someplace else, he wouldn't be here.
Frankie: What? You sayin' I'm gay!?
Joey: No, no I didn't say that. Come on, let's finish him off.
Frankie; No, I need to be alone with my thoughts.

Phaneron ★

The Thrilla' in Phila' - S2-E21

Vader: Feeny, you can't tell me what to do anymore. I'm not one of your punk students. I'm the face of death!
Mr. Feeny: You were scarier when you had acne.

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The Thrilla' in Phila' - S2-E21

Cory: Alright Joey, you want me, you got me.
Joey: Good. Tonight, midnight, the abandoned warehouse on 7th.
Cory: No, 4 o'clock, Feeny's backyard.
Joey: No, 8 o'clock, the abandoned shipyard by the pier.
Cory: No, dinner time, my kitchen.
Joey: Is it abandoned?

Phaneron ★

Turnaround - S2-E12

Mr. Feeny: Mr. Hunter, the girl in the white turtleneck, is that Ingrid Iverson?
Shawn: That's her.
Mr. Feeny: What on Earth has she done to herself?
Shawn: Oh, she didn't do it, we did. Cory and me.
Mr. Feeny: "Cory and I," Mr. Hunter.
Shawn: Oh yeah, sure, now everybody wants to take credit.

Phaneron ★

Me and Mr. Joad - S2-E4

Mr. Feeny: You know, you seem amused by this display of defiance, Mr. Turner.
Mr. Turner: Oh, I am, I gotta say. 'Cause if I had done to me what I did to them, then I'd have done the same thing to me that they did.
Mr. Feeny: Go to the board and diagram that sentence.

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Me and Mr. Joad - S2-E4

Mr. Feeny: I realise that all you 7th-graders are delicate, adolescent flowers, just beginning your high school blooming. And so I say this with utmost sensitivity: take this test, or die!

Phaneron ★

Six Forgotten Warriors Chapter 2: Unclaimed Legacy - S5-E3

Silver Sable: I am not a criminal. I am merely a professional for hire.
Spider-Man: Which means you just work for whichever creep pays the most. I think I prefer these guys over here. Their dishonesty is more honest.

Phaneron ★

[Marv is being executed].
Preacher: Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death...
Marv: Could you get a move on? I haven't got all night.

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Tree House of Horror IX - S10-E4

Chief Wiggum: Homer Simpson, you're under arrest for the murders of Moe Szyslak and Apu Nahasa... pasa... uh, just Moe. Just Moe.

Phaneron ★

Bart vs. Australia - S6-E16

Homer: [Looking at Uruguay on a globe] Heh heh heh heh! Look at this country: U R Gay.

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Milhouse Doesn't Live Here Anymore - S15-E12

Apu: Attention American bar devils: it's our anniversary. Free drinks for everyone.
Homer: That's great! I'm honored to drink to Apu and, uh, Apulina. You know, Marge and I have an anniversary coming up.
Apu: I have given Manjula many gifts, including a bouquet of flowers, diamond earrings, and we're going to see Paris... Hilton, in Paris... Texas, on our way to Paris... France.

Phaneron ★

Partners in Danger Chapter 8: The Return of the Green Goblin - S4-E8

The Punisher: Your friend Osborn here is a few pumpkins short of a full pie.

Phaneron ★

Margical History Tour - S15-E11

Homer: And now, the star of our show: my son, Mozart. He makes Bach turn back, Haydn go into hidin', and, well, those are the only ones there have been so far.

Phaneron ★

HOMR - S12-E9

Homer: Hey Flanders, headin' for church? Well, I thought I could save you a little time.
Flanders: Ooh, found a new shortcut?
Homer: Better. I was working on a flat-tax proposal and I accidentally proved there's no god.

Phaneron ★

Hello Gutter, Hello Fadder - S11-E6

Lenny: Hey Homer, that's four strikes in a row. You've got a perfect game goin'.
Homer: Really?
Carl: Careful what you say, Lenny. You'll jinx it.
Lenny: Alright, sorry. Miss. Miss! Sorry, I was callin' the waitress. Uh, this split you sold me is makin' me choke.
Homer: Lenny!
Lenny: What? I paid $7.10 for this split.
Carl: Will you at least call it a banana split, you dumb-wad!?
Lenny: Hey, spare me your gutter mouth!

Phaneron ★