Quotes from Tommy Wiseau movies and TV shows

Johnny: Peter, you always play psychologist with us.

Johnny: Of course, what do ya think? They already put my ideas into practice. The bank saves money, and they are using me, and I am the fool.

Johnny: Oh, hi, Claudette.
Claudette: Oh.
Johnny: Bye.

Johnny: Denny, two is great, but three is a crowd.

Johnny: I kill you, you bastard.
Mark: You couldn't kill me if you tried.
Johnny: You betrayed me! You're not good. You, you're just a chicken. Chip-chip-chip-chip-cheep-cheep.

Johnny: Thank you honey, this is a beautiful party. You invited all my friends, good thinking.

Johnny: Anything for my princess.

Johnny: I'm tired, I'm wasted... I love you, darling.

Johnny: What do you want from me, huh? HUH?

Johnny: Well, maybe you should have a girl, Mark.

Johnny: Are you okay, Denny?
Denny: I'm okay.
Johnny: Are you okay?
Denny: I'm okay.
Claudette: What's okay? He's taking drugs.

Johnny: Hey, everybody! I have an announcement to make. We're expecting.

Johnny: I have a serious problem with Lisa. Um, I don't think she's faithful to me. In fact, I know she isn't.

Johnny: Lisa, talk to me, please.

Johnny: Denny, don't you have something else to do?
Denny: I just like to watch you guys.

Mark: So can I come in tomorrow, like late afternoon?
Johnny: Absolutely. 8:00?
Mark: Great.

Johnny: Let's go eat, hah?

Johnny: You bitch! you bitch! you bitch.

Johnny: Thank you, honey, this is a beautiful party! You invited all my friends. Good thinking.

Lisa: Do you want me to order a pizza?
Johnny: Whatever, I don't care.
Lisa: I already ordered a pizza.
Johnny: You think about everything, ha ha ha.